I’m looking at things positively today!
While I haven’t been completely disorder-free (I did go on that binge on Wednesday…) I HAVE been bulimia-free for 109 days! The little victories are making me feel much better about myself! And really, that’s not little. That’s a massive victory! I just need to see it that way. And I’m starting to! I really am! There’s been a couple of stumbling blocks in the past couple days, but I’m doing the best I can.
Last night at the burger bar, that SAME stupid guy who made the “you must have fucked up your period because you’re anorexic” comment just HAD to say something about the fact that my sister-in-law and I were having salads (with burgers on the way of course).
“Oh you didn’t order a burger?”
I was about ready to slam my fucking fork down onto my plate and then say extremely calmly “Do NOT pretend to understand me. You have completely no fucking clue about what I eat, why I eat it, or any of the reasoning behind ANY of it as I have never discussed it with you. DO NOT pretend that you know. I HAVE ordered a burger and I am NOT nor have I EVER been anorexic so please keep your incredibly poorly-deduced judgements to yourself from now on.” Then smile at him and continue eating my yummy salad.
Instead we just said “No, we ordered burgers too.” And that was it.
He really really really needs a lesson in keeping his goddamn mouth shut when his opinion is not asked for.
Whole Grain Oat and Nut Pancakes
Taken from: http://darkredcrema.com/tag/whole-grain/
3/4 cup rolled oats, ground (oat flour is not a good substitute – I’ve tried)
3/4 cup white whole wheat or standard whole wheat flour
1 1/2 teaspoon aluminum free baking powder
1/4 teaspoon baking soda
scant 1/2 teaspoon sea salt or kosher salt
2 Tablespoons natural cane sugar
3 Tablespoons finely chopped or ground pecans (1 oz.)
3 Tablespoons finely chopped or ground almonds (1 oz.)
1 1/2 cups buttermilk (plus or minus 1-2 tablesoons. depending on preferred thickness)
3 Tablespoons vegetable oil
salted butter for cooking
Grind oats and nuts (or you may use pre-ground nuts) to a powdery consistency in a mini chopper, leaving a few small bits for texture. In a medium bowl, mix dry ingredients together. In a separate bowl, whisk egg until pale yellow, then add oil and whisk to combine. Add buttermilk to the egg and oil and blend. Pour wet ingredients into bowl with dry ingredients and mix until just combined. Allow batter to sit for 10-15 minutes to give the leavening time to react and thicken the batter. Preheat a large skillet or griddle over medium high heat, grease with salted butter, and turn heat down to medium. Ladle 1/4 – 1/3 cup batter onto pan for each pancake. Pancake batter should sizzle a bit when poured into the pan, but not smoke. Turn heat down to medium low and allow to cook until edges just start to dry and bubbles appear throughout the pancake, then flip and cook until set in the middle. If pancakes are over-browning, and not cooking through, turn the heat down on the pan and increase the cooking time. Cooking time on the second side will be less than on the first. Repeat with more butter and batches, until batter is finished. This makes about 9-10 four inch pancakes. Serve with maple syrup, butter, and fruit, if desired.
*I did top mine with some sugar-free maple syrup and a half-handful of pecans. I did not cook mine in butter, just a non-stick griddle. THEY COOKED all the way through! Any little pancake victory is a good one for me!! I’m gaining more confidence in my pancake making abilities! These were quite good, I even picked a recipe that had very little sugar in it. I wasn’t sure I’d be able to finish the whole stack! So I’m nice and full and VERY happy that I went the healthy route once again for breakfast! I’d like to try eating healthy for every meal up until Wednesday if I can so I can AT LEAST say I’ve gone a week without eating any total crap.
Broccoli and Cheese Sandwich with a spicy Brandy Mustard Mayo
Well, I sauteed some broccoli and onion in a little olive oil, then threw in about a T of low fat cream cheese and probably about a T of Colby cheese with about 1/8 cup of milk and let all that melt together. I put that onto a roll with some chopped tomatoes on top and then finished with a sauce made of mayo, mustard, brandy and habenero hot sauce. Shook a little pepper on top. BAM! It was really good! For something I just threw together really quick I was pretty impressed, especially with the mustard mayo sauce! WOW what a kick!!!
Balsamic Strawberry Chicken on top of Cauliflower and Parsnip puree
A couple recipes here!
Roasted Strawberries With Wine & Balsamic Vinegar Sauce
Taken from: http://www.food.com/recipeprint.do?rid=310375
1 tablespoon butter
1 teaspoon vanilla
2 pints fresh strawberries
2 tablespoons brown sugar
3 tablespoons dry red wine
1 ½ tablespoons balsamic vinegar
1 tablespoon butter, chilled
vanilla ice cream (I obviously omitted this)
preheat oven to 400°F.
Add 2 Tbsp butter to oven safe skillet and melt in oven. Add Vanilla to butter to butter and combine.
Place strawberries, cut side down in skillet andsprinkle with brown sugar. Bake at 400°F for 10 minutes or until berries are soft. Remove pan from oven.
With a slotted spoon, remove berries from pan and set aside to let cool.
Add wine and vinegar to skillet and simmer over medium heat until reduced slightly.
Remove from heat and whisk in chilled butter.
I did this in combination with this recipe:
Grilled Chicken Breasts with Strawberry Red Wine Balsamic Sauce
1 package (16 ounces or 3 cups) Driscoll’s Strawberries, divided
4 teaspoons light olive or vegetable oil, divided
2/3 cups sliced shallots
1 clove garlic, pressed or chopped
1 small bay leaf (I used Tarragon instead)
1/2 teaspoons dried thyme leaves
2 tablespoons balsamic vinegar
1/3 cups red wine
3/4 cups chicken broth
1 1/2 teaspoons cornstarch
2 teaspoons cold water
Salt and pepper, to taste
4 skinless, boneless chicken breasts (I used 2 small boneless skinless thighs)
1 cup sliced Mushrooms
Here’s what I did with these 2 recipes. I made the first one rather true to its original recipe. I let the vinegar, red wine and chicken stock reduce. I added the chicken to this reduction and let it cook about 20 minutes, flipping the thighs over a couple times. If the sauce reduced too much, I just added a bit more wine and vinegar. I sauteed the onions, garlic and mushrooms separately, then when the chicken was done, I removed it from the reduction, added the butter to the sauce (from the first recipe) and added the cornstarch, onion mushroom mixture and finally the roasted strawberries (along with the sauce in that pan). I roasted some cauliflower and sliced parsnips in the oven for about 20 mins (about twice as long as the strawberries were in there for) at 400. I blended them in a blender with a little milk and margarine. I put the chicken on top of the puree and then the strawberry sauce on top of everything.
*Besides the fact that all you can see on the dish is sauce, to prove that there was chicken and puree under there I took a picture of it all in my fork hehe. WOW! Per usual, this dish was fucking awesome! I INHALED it! Roasting the strawberries was a GREAT idea on top of roasting the cauliflower and parsnips. It gives everything such an amazing depth! TRY IT! I mean….damn.YAY for cheap sale strawberries!
Oh also I had a small piece of my dad’s birthday cake for dessert. I was really good today and I couldn’t let it go bad, my dad is an amazing baker.
Today was a good day. I got a project finished, I did my laundry, I worked out, and my husband is away for the evening. Ahhhhhhh! It’s great to fucking RELAX tonight! Make myself an amazing meal, watch the Oscars (I was really routing for Gary Oldman!) and play with Jack Donaghy the cat. Tomorrow is Meatless Monday! YAY! I gotta think hard about what I want for breakfast, wanna try to do something healthy awesome again! And I still have all these strawberries! What to do what to do…
Exercise: 1/2 hour of yoga, 1.5 hours at the gym