Food and weight-maintenence blog for the POST diet girl

Archive for May, 2012

Eating on purpose

I had an appointment at Planned Parenthood to take care of my girly parts. No breakfast. No time.

Since I was already out and about I decided to stop at the ex-loser’s house to pick up some more shit that I needed. I also had to clean out my old work room so that he could put down new carpet and put in an ad for a roommate. I actually did not have a bad time. I cleaned out everything except for some old things I’d kept since we were kids. A box of old letters from him from High School, a couple of hats that he left in my room once when I was 17, a folder of pictures and other things from him also given to me when he was 14. I put those things into a corner and told him I should throw them out, but didn’t have the heart to. I didn’t want them. He could do whatever he wanted with them. He said he would probably put them into a box and keep them.

What an idiot.

I contemplated going to my grandma’s. I promised her a visit at some point this week. I know she’ll try to take me out to eat. Can I make some sort of excuse? Ah! I have all of this stuff in my car that I’m moving and the front seat is too full of stuff to fit someone! That’s a good excuse! I’ll use that. I will visit her.

She takes one look at me and knows something is wrong. Because I look like shit. She calls me a “skinny minnie” which in her gentle way means she thinks I’m too thin. I told her how I’d been depressed. I hadn’t eaten, save for a rib and a couple of pieces of broccoli at the reunion and 1 piece of fruit this day or that day, in about 5 days. She tells me “Well, I can’t tell you what to do, but I can give you love and hope that helps.” I start telling her about G (PFH#3) and how disappointed he would be if he knew I still wasn’t eating and this made me start to cry. I’m normally a lot stronger around my grandma. I thought that I couldn’t hurt him or my grandma like this. It’s stupid and pointless. I hate looking like crap. So she took me out to lunch where I had a small cup of vegetable soup and about 1/4 of this massive turkey salad. I took the rest of it home.

My grandma gave me money for a counter-height table that I’d had my eye on. I can’t wait to start cooking on it!

She also gave me a BEAUTIFUL wooden cutting board.

I think she is trying to encourage me to eat, no?

I unpack my car at home and get some equipment set up in the basement for some business related things. In between all of this I am flirting with Potential Future Husband #1 on the computer and let others know that I’m going to be OK. I finish up a project and sit down to eat the rest of my salad. I get through about half of it. I just can’t eat any more. I throw out the rest. I did the very best I could. I was going to try and choke down all of it just to get it into me, but I didn’t want to make myself sick. That would be counter-productive.

I promised another friend I would have breakfast in the morning.

I will.


This sucks

I had a banana.

And the only reason I did that was because I was going dancing and can’t afford to have an ambulance called on me if I pass out.

I wore a super tiny crocheted rainbow top and a little black skirt. My entire midsection was showing. I look like I’m dying. I look like shit.

I hate it.

His ex-girlfriend got to see him. She lives in the same apartment complex as him. I did not get to see him. She had to go and post all over Facebook about how much he loved his birthday present she gave him and all that.

I need a smoke/dinner.

Please don’t tell G…

(I can’t fucking stand the thought of hurting him.)


This shit sucks.

I casually in the middle of conversation told Potential Future Husband #1 that I miss him.

He did not say it back.

So I did not eat.

At some point in the afternoon I had a small orange.

I went on a walk and bought cigarettes. I don’t even smoke.

I plan on living off of those for my meals for the next few days.

I did go to work and give my last cupcake to G (Potential Future Husband #3, technically). I sort of just went back to his department, put it down on the register whispering “This is for you….I gotta go, bye!” And he stood there in shock and awe with this beautiful happy/confused look on his face and eventually managed a “Wow…thank you…” as I left and waved at him.

I got to chat with him on the computer later at night. He told me I was quite the “talented baker” and likened me to a Cupcake Fairy who brings cupcakes to those they find deserving and then flit away. Sort of like me. ^_^ I admitted to him that he’d brightened my day. I was severely depressed. I know that he quit smoking years ago, so I admitted to him that I’d bought a pack of cigarettes. He absolutely BEGGED me to throw them out. I told him I’d not eaten in 3 days. He reminded me that food is fuel and I need it to function, he knows I had an ED at one point and knows I’ll just get even more depressed if I don’t eat. I tell him these things because I want him to yell at me. I want someone to care. He’s such a wonderful guy. He takes such amazing care of me, which I told him. He deserves so much more than what life has given him. He needs proper fucked.

I’m working on that.

It’s all so stupid. I have nothing to be depressed over. I talked to PFH#1 on the computer this night as well. He was just as flirty and rambunctious as usual. We had a great time chatting. He invited me over sometime to watch more stuff with him. It was nice talking to both of them at at the same time. They’re both wonderful guys…

He’s having dinner with his parents, so I don’t get to cook for him for his birthday.

I think I’m going dancing tomorrow night.

It’s going to be hard as my energy will be fucked due to the fact that I have not eaten.

It’s better than drinking all day….which was my other option.

Exercise: 5 mile walk

I’m not OK (I proimise)

Got up early and started my morning off right…

Just a small extension of yesterdays antics.

Cupcakes still look gorgeous in the fridge. I hope they taste ok, I have not tried one.

No breakfast, not hungry.

My brother brings me something to carry my cupcakes in. I keep forgetting I don’t have things. I am poor.

We drive up to my Aunt and Uncle’s house. My Aunt has heard of my “famous cupcakes” and simply must take a peek. Here’s hoping they taste as good as they look.

This small town is putting on a Memorial Day parade. My brother and I want to go watch it. We park in a Family Dollar parking lot and walk up the street past the parade (waving at everyone and catching Tootsie rolls, which I put into my purse and do not eat…I love Toostie rolls…) up to the park where the picnic will be. We shoot the shit around there for a little while, walk back to the car and drive back to the house. We help load food and whatnots into the cars and head off back to the park.

It is very hot and the only thing I can think of is “I really hope my buttercream doesn’t melt off…”

My life truly revolves around food.

Even though I haven’t eaten any in 2 days.

There’s so much food. SO much food. Normally, this would excite me. Today, I am apathetic. I want to be excited, but I’m just not hungry. My brother knows I haven’t eaten. He encourages me to grab something. Just something. Even if its the only thing I eat all day.

I go for a cupcake first just to make certain they don’t suck.

They are some of the best I’ve made yet.

I find the smallest piece of rib I can find (2 bones). I grab the smallest piece of chicken I see. I take a very small serving of my brother’s broccoli salad (literally only 3 pieces of broccoli, some raisins and some onion). I grab a little pasta salad, some cherry tomatoes and baby carrots.

I eat the small portion of ribs and broccoli salad. I eat not even half of the small chicken breast. I pick at the pasta salad. I eat the cherry tomatoes, but not the carrots. I’ve left half a plate of food. I feel terrible, I HATE wasting food. But I can’t eat any more. I feel sick.

I also remember afterwards that it is Monday and I shouldn’t have eaten any of that.


My mind has been gone. It is not here. It is with him.

I miss him more than I’ve missed anyone in my life.

My cupcakes are a MASSIVE hit. My cousin INSISTS I open my own shop and goes around to everyone making certain they’ve tried one. Everyone who does agrees with her. I feel wonderful. Sick, but wonderful.

I have 1 left over. I decide I will take it to work and give it to G. If he’s there. I know he has some nerd convention that he is going to this week (can’t imagine why I like him) but cannot remember when it is. He’s always so goddamn sweet to me and taking me home every night and whatnot, he deserves one of my cupcakes. When I get home, I work on a project for a couple hours. I get that finished then go to call work to ask if he is there. The phone rings out. Shit. It’s a holiday, they are closed already. If he was there he is long gone.


I finish up another order and get it packaged. I decide to go on a night walk. No dinner. I’m not hungry.

At 9:30 ish I leave. I walk to the farthest post office, literally dancing all the way there and back listening to REM, Queens of the Stone Age, NIN, Simon & Garfunkel… It’s such a beautiful evening. I am so happy.

I miss him so much.

I will make up my Meatless Monday once again with a Meatless Tuesday instead. Knowing how I’ve been lately, it’ll just end up being “Foodless Tuesday” anyway.

I want to just drive to his place. And just cry to him. And tell him how much I miss him. How I couldn’t go another minute without seeing him. How I’ve missed him for years. How if I have to go one more fucking day without him I will lose my shit.

He and I have never worked that way. We’ve never once in our lives expressed our feelings AT ALL for each other. Not even when we were fucking 10 years ago. I would just go home without so much as a “Wham bam, thank you ma’am”. We never talked about it. Not before. Not during. Not after.

He told me he loved me once. Probably about 3 years ago. While I was married. He might have been drunk.

I told him I loved him too.

Exercise: Walk up and town small town street/park a couple miles, 4 mile night walk.


I think my plan is to get my workout for the day through continuous masturbation.

Because that’s all I’ve been doing.

All day.

I’m utterly insatiable.

Be right back…

Food Fail

I am sorry. I could not eat today.

I tried. I went to the fridge and opened it and tried to find something, ANYTHING appetizing.

My stomach did not growl all day.

I remember when this used to happen to me. I am lovesick.

And all of the time I should have spent making and eating food I used to get off instead.

I did however make cupcakes.

Extra Lemony Buttermilk Cupcakes with Raspberry Lemon custard filling and Lemon Buttercream frosting topped with a fresh Raspberry

My first attempt at the cupcakes themselves were a fail. They did not rise or cook through all the way at all. It was a recipe using sour cream, I’m also learning how my new oven works still. They’re all different. So this time I tried an Ina Garten recipe for lemon cake using buttermilk instead. She did not disappoint, none of my Food Network stars do. They rose beautifully and cooked all the way through. They were moist and fluffy. Though I tried the batter to make sure it was lemony enough, I did not try an actual cupcake. I was only able to make 12. I want all of them for the reunion. So I’m just going to trust they don’t suck. I made a lemon raspberry filling out of lemon pudding mix, fresh lemon juice, fresh raspberries, sugar, water and an egg yolk for that custardy consistency. The buttercream frosting was made from butter, sugar, fresh squeezed lemon juice, lemon zest and powdered sugar.

I gotta go right now.

Exercise: 8 hours of getting off.


I am freaking out entirely now.

I thought I was bad yesterday.

At least I’m going to the house to pack up some more shit before going on my date.

I also made a make-ahead breakfast last night so I could throw it in the oven and get an early start on my incredibly anxious day.

Strawberry Rhubarb Baked French Toast

Adapted from:


1 loaf French Bread
6 large eggs
2 1/2 cups milk (This is where I get crazy, I used half buttermilk, half sweetened condensed milk)
3/4 cups granulated sugar
1 teaspoon orange zest
2 tablespoons vanilla extract
1 teaspoon cinnamon
1 cup sliced strawberries
1 cup sliced rhubarb

Streusel Topping:
1/2 cup all-purpose flour
1/2 cup brown sugar
1 teaspoon cinnamon
1/4 teaspoon salt
1/2 cup cold butter, cut into pieces

Maple syrup-for serving


1. Spray a 9 x 13-inch baking pan with cooking spray. Tear French bread into chunks, or cut into cubes, and evenly place in the pan.

2. In a large bowl, mix together eggs and milk. In a small bowl, combine sugar and orange zest. Rub together with your fingers until fragrant. Add sugar mixture to the eggs and milk. Add in vanilla extract and cinnamon. Stir until combined. Pour evenly over bread. Combine strawberries and rhubarb together in a medium bowl. Pour evenly over French toast. Take a spoon and poke the strawberries and rhubarb down into the bread. Cover the pan with saran wrap and store in the refrigerator for several hours or overnight.

3. In a separate bowl, mix together flour, brown sugar, cinnamon, and salt. Add butter pieces and cut into the dry mixture using a fork or your hands. Combine until the mixture resembles sand with a few pea sized chunks. Cover and store mixture in the refrigerator.

4. When you’re ready to bake the French toast, preheat oven to 350 degrees F. Remove French toast from refrigerator and sprinkle crumb mixture over the top. Bake for 45-55 minutes, or until the French toast is set and golden brown.

5. Serve warm with maple syrup.

*I needed a treat. I needed to do ANYTHING to make me less anxious. I made this the night before knowing I needed to use up strawberries, rhubarb, and sweetened condensed milk. It was so decadent, so custardy and sweet, SO bad for me…I felt great afterwards. Hehe. I only ate half luckily. I had to run to the house at 10 AM to start moving more shit.

Spent 5 hours at the house. At least ex-idiot was cordial and offered me lunch (which I did not take, though it was nice he offered) and shared his york peppermint patties with me. Candy is my sanity-food right now. I did ask him if my handcuffs were still under the bed (yes kids, I own a pair of Smith & Wesson black with blue finish handcuffs…used to use them on Potential Future Husband #1) while he was cleaning under there and asked him to grab them for me.

He knows I’m going on a date tonight. I’m sure his mind is just racing. Good. Stupid idiot.

I got home and unloaded the boxes into the basement. The other tennant was freaking out over this MASSIVE spider in the basement. She said she wouldn’t do her laundry because she was scared of it. She didn’t want to kill it and was actually waiting for me to come home to see if I could help her. Incredibly cute. I assured her I would take care of the situation. I coaxed the palm-sized spider into a bag I was already holding and let him go out next to a tree behind the garage. He was so cute. ^_^


PB&J w/Apple

Too nervous to cook.

Asked him if he wants me to show up early. He said yes. I asked him what I should wear. He said anything I want.

So I go all out.

Shave legs, underarms, bikini line (just in case)
Use scented soap I think he would like
Do my hair (it looked PERFECT)
Do my make-up (I pretty much only ever put on make-up for special occasions)
Pick out a beautiful skirt from Express circa 2000
Black button-up shirt that makes me look really thin
Multi-gold 4 inch heels
Re-paint my nails with a pink that my sister-in-law gave me
Pink sapphire heart necklace
No panties

I look so incredibly fabulous and fuckable. NO MAN could possibly resist.

I warn him that I am overdressed. And heading over.

I am so nervous.

I’m shaking as I’m putting on my nail polish. I somehow manage to not completely fuck it all up. I don’t know how.

I tell my cousin that I’m insanely nervous. She tells me not to worry. I got this. I’m beautiful. He already is crazy about me, everything will be fine.

And off I go.

I get there about half an hour before anyone else. He is actually outside when I show up throwing stuff away (obviously cleaning for guests and whatnot). I make a grand exit from my car. He says I am not overdressed. I look awesome. We go in and just casually watch some recorded stuff on TV so he can clear space for the UFC fight to record. We laugh and chat and just sort of…be ourselves. No pressure. I’m feeling less anxious. I remember why I like him so much. I’m so at ease around him.

Guests start to show up. I of course hope they see how hot I am. I hope they’re jealous of him. I hope they tell him hes so getting laid that night while I’m out of the room. I love it.

While watching the fight, we sit close, but not enough to make it completely obvious that we’d rather be all over each other. Commentary from the guys is hilarious. I’ve missed hanging out with this group. A lot. One of the guys brings candy. 4 bags of candy. Hallelujah my fucking savoir. I eat Rolos and Twizzlers and Sour Patch Kids all night. PFH#1 orders pizza, mentions earlier in the evening that he wanted to order the chicken BBQ one, but that he tends to get it without pineapple. I mention that I adore pineapple (of course) and would love it if he ordered it half with and half without.

He just orders the whole thing with pineapple.

AND eats it.

THAT. THAT kids, means something to me. Just the fact that he’s willing to try things and go out of his way for me is fucking awesome. Especially when it comes to food. Food means a lot to me. THAT was quite a gesture.

We have an awesome time, I am very much at ease around his friends because I know them all so well already. Its as if we didn’t all spend most of the past 10 years apart.

The boys all leave. I make it RATHER obvious that I am staying behind. I have no intentions of going anywhere yet. He goes out with the guys to throw out the pizza boxes (cleanliness, I like this) and I hope they all told him he was getting laid. I love that I know they’re talking about me. With “good luck”s and all that.

He comes back in and we watch Wilfred, a program I recommended that is awesome. While watching I do eventually make a move and grab his arm and rest my head on his shoulder. He rested his head on mine. It was incredibly pleasant. I could have fallen asleep from contentment. As I go to leave we hug for a little too long in the doorway. I contemplate kissing his cheek. Doing something. We let go and talk for a minute longer. We hug again, as his hands slowly work their way down to my backside,  I give him a very tender, short goodnight kiss on the lips.

He said “Thank you…” afterwards in the most shy way I’ve ever heard.

I leave.

I miss him so much already.



I’m incredibly nervous about my date tomorrow.

I don’t know why. It’s not like we’ve never had sex. We have. Twice. (Though he would like to think it was more ~_^.)

And not that we WILL have sex.

But I’m still so nervous.

I spent the day walking and shopping and working just to keep my mind busy. So I don’t freak out.

I have a ton of confidence. I love the power I have over guys. It’s so easy.

But with him…he’s always been my biggest weakness. I can’t get too far into it because…I don’t want to…but when he wants me around, I’m there in a heartbeat. And I always have been.

I made a mix CD 3 years ago called “Songs That Remind Me of My Ex-Boyfriends”, but really its just 5 tracks that remind me of him and 5 that don’t remind me of anyone in particular.

Every time my husband was out of town, he was the first one I’d call. Every. Time.

I never ever cheated on my husband. But goddamn if it wasn’t difficult when “he” was around.

Every time he’d have a party for his birthday, I was invited. We’d get drunk and he’d hang all over me. I’m sure our friends were like “Dude, she’s married. Don’t do that. She’ll break your heart.” I’m sure they know. About everything. Because I’m hot. And guys dish to each other on the hot girls they bang.

Look, I’m just being honest here.

I’m so nervous.


Just cereal. A lot to do today. Needed it to be quick and fast so I could go on a walk. And walk I did. For hours. I went to a local meat market to check out what they had for a requested birthday dinner from Potential Future Husband #1. With Alton’s words repeating in my head, I check out the cuts of meat closely and study what I see. As I’m doing this I look up and see these little advertising postcards for Next Food Network Star. I gasp loudly and with a massive smile on my face grab for the one with Alton on it and cradle it all the way out the door. I don’t normally post pictures of me, but I’d like to make an exception for this:

Dear God I love that man.


Spicy Peanut Eggplant And Shallot Stew

Taken from:

1 lb. Eggplant, peeled, chopped in 1/2 inch cubes
1 tsp salt
4 oz. Shallots, peeled and sliced very thin (Did not have, so I omitted these)
1/4 cup peanut oil
1 medium yellow onion, diced
1 hot chili, seeded and minced
1” cube of ginger, peeled and minced
1 tsp ground cumin
1/8-1/4 tsp ground cayenne pepper (optional)
1 tsp ground coriander
1/4 tsp ground tumeric
1/3 cup tomato paste
1 16 oz. Can roasted diced tomatoes w/ juice
5 cups water or light veggie broth
1/2 cup creamy or chunky natural peanut butter
6 oz green beans, trimmed and cut into 2 inch pieces
2 T fresh lemon juice
1/3 cup coarsely chopped cilantro, lightly packed
chopped roasted peanuts and cilantro leaves for garnish

In a large bowl or colander toss eggplant cubes with salt. Allow to sit of 30 minutes to soften, then gently rinse eggplant chunks with cold running water. Drain and set aside.

In a large stock pot heat 2 T peanut oil over medium high heat. Add shallots and fry, occasionally stirring, for about 20 minutes until very soft, browned and slightly caramelized. Scoop shallots out of pot and set aside.

Add 1 T of oil to pot and add eggplant, stirring to coat with oil. Stir and cook eggplant for 12-15 minutes until slightly tender. Remove eggplant from heat and set aside (I toss it in the same bowl with the shallots).

Add remaining 1 T of oil to the pot again, then add ginger and chile and fry for 30 seconds. Add ground cumin, coriander, tumeric and fry for another 30 second then add onion. Stir and fry till onion is just slightly soft and translucent, about 5-6 minutes. Add tomato paste, stir and fry mixture for 1 minute.

Pour diced tomatoes, water or broth, eggplant, string beans and shallots into pot with frying onion/spice mixture. Stir to combined and raise heat to medium high. Bring to a boil for 5 minutes, then reduce heat.

In a separate bowl stir peanut butter to combine any separated oils. Pour a ladleful of hot soup onto peanut butter. Stir peanut butter with soup till creamy and peanut butter is completely emulsified. Scrape peanut butter mixture into rest of simmering soup, stirring to combine.

Simmer soup on medium-low heat, covered, for 35-45 minutes or until eggplant is very tender. Remove from heat and stir in cilantro and lemon juice. Salt to taste after soup has cooled for at least half an hour. True to soup form, the taste improves when heated up the next day.

*There was a LOT of this I did not do hehe. I did not give the eggplant time to drain, nor did I give the onions a half an hour to caramelize properly NOR did I let it simmer for 45 minutes. Otheriwise, all the other ingredients I had and used and it was AWESOME. It was creamy and spicy and a perfect way to use up that eggplant!


Balsamic Strawberry Chicken

I referenced this recipe for tonight’s dinner. Which as usual was fanfuckingtastic. I put it on sticky rice instead of puree this time, but of course it was still wonderful.


I finished a couple of orders to take my mind off of being so nervous. I can’t imagine the absolute wreck I’m going to be tomorrow….I kind of want to throw up. (You can take that any way you want.)

Exercise: 6 mile walk

Will work for date Pt. 2

This was the day I took in trade for my Saturday night. Looking forward to it because I get to work it with one of my favorite men there! YAY! AND will be happy the whole time knowing that Saturday I don’t have to work. I’m starting to get nervous about my date. Hehe. We talk every day and he tells me how excited he is and he’s hoping I come over a little early…which I probably will.

I don’t want him to be my rebound.

He was sort of my rebound the first time. 10 years ago. I won’t let that happen to him again.

So there probably won’t be much hanky panky here people. I know you were looking forward to it and all.


Veggie Breakfast Scramble

Sauteed some onions, garlic, potatoes, carrots, green pepper and zucchini. Scrambled some eggs on the side with a little milk. Added some dried parsley, salt and pepper. Grated a little Pepperjack and Sharp Cheddar on top. Heaven.


Man the angle on that ham sammich makes it look amazing! You can tell how small it actually is though next to that apple. No, its not a ridiculously large apple. It’s a small sammich hehe.


I had some leftover tomato pasta sauce I’d made from a while ago. I boiled up a cup and a half of pasta really quickly and tossed it into the sauce and brought it to work. FINALLY I’m learning how to not let food go bad! I HATE wasting food. Next project: Use up that eggplant in there as it is already getting a bit wrinkled. CANNOT THROW AWAY! NOOO throwing away food anymore!


Work would have been better had they put me on the salesfloor. Instead I had to cashier all night. Meaning I didn’t get to speak with G at all. Not cool. This made me sad. BUT he did take me home. He’s so incredibly sweet. He said he can’t stand the thought of something happening to me walking home that late at night. And I am NEVER an inconvenience for him to take home (I only live a 5 minute drive up the street). So of course as soon as we walk outside, he motions his head to his car and says “Come on!” I don’t fight. I’d love to go on a night walk, but I didn’t get to talk to him all night, and he would feel terrible if he didn’t take me home. So I skipped alongside of him and chatted away to his car. We made a lunch date for next Saturday. We have lunch all the time. So it’s not a “date” date. I really do like him though. He’s another one of those older guys who isn’t really remotely attractive to most other people. But I like him. He loves good food and good music and British nerd TV and board games and books. And I’ve decided, just now, that I would fuck him.

Something I think I’ve learned about me: I equate sex with friendship. If I’m really close to you mentally, I want to be close to you physically. I want to make you feel good. I’ve had sex with a lot of my friends in my day (obviously not while I’m married) and somehow, it never managed to complicate anything. Potential Future Husband #1 was one of those. I think they knew I was doing it BECAUSE we were close friends. And it was what I knew they wanted. And I love sex, so I loved doing it for them. It made me happy to make them happy.

I love the people in my life SO MUCH there is quite literally nothing I wouldn’t do for them.

Exercise: 2 mile walk to work, 8 hours on my feet at retail job


Does anyone else adore dancing as much as I do?

Granted, I can only really dance one way, but I dance that way damn well.

As a treat to myself for all the crap I’ve been going through lately, I took myself out dancing. The place I like to go to is about half an hour away. So for me, it’s a big treat.

I tend to go to gothic/industrial clubs. Not because I am goth myself. But I do love the music, it’s fun to dance to, and goth boys are very respectful of women. No one ever comes up behind me trying to grind on my ass. I hate that shit. I just want to be left alone when I dance.

I need to start going more often. I wish this club was closer to me. I worked up such a crazy sweat, I was just dripping pink all over the floor. That’s what I get for going immediately after re-dying my hair. Such a  great workout, if I could go every week and dance like that for 3 hours every time I go, I will not have a problem keeping weight off.


Parsnip Muffins (naturally by AB) with Banana and Almonds

Adapted from:


  • 1-ounce sliced almonds
  • Nonstick spray
  • 8 1/2 ounces all-purpose flour
  • 1 teaspoon baking powder
  • 3/4 teaspoon baking soda
  • 1/2 teaspoon freshly grated nutmeg
  • 1/2 teaspoon kosher salt
  • 3 whole eggs
  • 3/4 cup plain whole milk yogurt (I substituted with mashed ripe banana)
  • 1/4 cup vegetable oil
  • 8 ounces sugar
  • 10 ounces grated parsnips


Place the almonds in a single layer in a pie pan and place in oven. Heat the oven to 375 degrees F. Bake the nuts until lightly toasted, approximately 20 minutes while the oven heats. Meanwhile, spray a standard 12-cup muffin tin with the nonstick spray and set aside.


Combine the flour, baking powder, baking soda, nutmeg, and salt in the bowl of a food processor, and process for 5 seconds.


Whisk the eggs, yogurt, vegetable oil, and sugar in a large mixing bowl until combined. Add the flour mixture and parsnips, and fold with a spatula until all of the flour is moistened, there will be some lumps. Divide the mixture evenly among the muffin cups using a level 2 1/2-ounce disher or 1/3 cup measure. Sprinkle the top of each muffin with the toasted almonds. Bake for 20 to 25 minutes or until the muffins reach an internal temperature of 210 degrees F and are golden brown, rotating halfway through baking. If needed, use a small knife or offset spatula to loosen the muffins and immediately remove them from the tin to a cooling rack, and cool for 15 minutes. Serve warm. Store completely cooled muffins in an airtight container for up to 3 days.

*So I now check my fridge every morning to see what needs to be used so I don’t throw anything away. I HATE throwing food away. Today I discover I have a parsnip and a banana that both desperately need to be used. I know Alton has an amazing parsnip muffin recipe as I’ve used it before. All I did was replaced the yogurt (which I don’t have right now anyway) with banana. Once again, I am a complete genius as the nuttiness of the parsnip complimented swimmingly with the banana.

The plumbers (who did not show up yesterday) came today early. Like around 10 AM. I had JUST finished eating my muffins when they showed up. I told them I would have made more had I known they were going to be there so early! They told me that it smelled good and they wish I had too! I felt great about myself.


My lunch looked exactly the same as it did yesterday. Sandwich (PB&J this time) with cheese and an extra piece of bread. I didn’t take a picture because it just seemed redundant.


I went to my brother’s for dinner. He made butternut squash curry on sticky rice. As usual, it was a perfect balance of savory, spicy, and a little sweetness with the squash. He’s a mastermind.


My brother felt partially responsible for the fact that my internet wasn’t working up to par, so he plugged in his laptop to the TV and let me watch FNS on it! YAYAYAYAY! I could NOT have been happier!!! This made my night. That stupid show is the best thing on TV at the moment. I hang on every goddamn word.  He was going to join me at the club, but decided he was too tired and had to get up early for work. Which is fine, I was just going to go by myself anyway. I tend to prefer that.

Exercise: 3 hours of pretty hardcore goth dancing