I got to work with both PFH#2 AND PFH#3 all night.
My other favorite boy was there for the first 2 hours of my shift.
I never had such a wonderful night at work ever.
And I’ve been working there for 10 years.
The one that was there for the first 2 hours, he’s not a potential future husband as he is married, is VERY perceptive of people…he can tell you things, pretty in-depth things, about yourself after only speaking with you for 5 minutes. He asks me if there is a reason I’d fancied myself up for work so much that night. (I never wear eye makeup, its a big deal when I do. It definitely “means something”.) I shyly explain that I have a massive crush on G. But we’re just friends right now. He is INCREDIBLY intrigued by this. Just like everyone else I’ve discussed this with, they LOVE the idea. G is a wonderful guy that deserves everything in life. He would appreciate me. He would never take me for granted. And I deserve someone like him. My friend encourages me to pursue this further. He’s a good friend.
I go back and forth for the rest of the night between chatting with PFH#2 and PFH#3. It’s easy to chat with #2 as he is working the front of the store with me all night. I have to sneak away for a bit every once in a while to go chat with #3…always completely worth it. SO great to have all of my boys there. I get SOME work done in between, but work happens in between riveting conversations with my boys.
They amaze me so much.
I walk out with G and he of course asks if I’d walked there that day. I say yes. He says “Well then you’re coming with me.” I say “I knoooooow, that’s why I didn’t even bother changing back into my walking shoes…” Everyone else follows us and we all wait for the manager to finish up and lock the door. While we are waiting, I joke loudly to #2 “Beautiful night for a walk! Don’t you agree?” He says “You’re not walking.” I laugh and tell him “I KNOOOOOW! We’ve already discussed this before any of you came out…”
G takes me home.
We sit in the car in the driveway talking for 2 hours.
We discuss the past, the future, love, loss, dreams, travels, depression, happiness…
He has loved in his life so much more deeply than any man I’ve ever known.
And has lost equally as deeply.
My heart just breaks for him. I just want to cry. He deserves so much more.
It is now 2AM. He has a 45 minute drive home. I insist I don’t want to keep him up. He insists that he enjoys the time he spends with me and doesn’t mind the slight lack of sleep.
I give him a big hug and hold him a little too long.
Then I go inside.
I stand in my bedroom doorway in the dark watching the headlights out my back window as they slowly turn around and head back out my driveway. I lean on my door frame and bang my head against it for a good 10 minutes wondering why I didn’t invite him up. Stupid, stupid, stupid…why didn’t you invite him up???
I feel as though he’s far too much of a gentleman to take up an offer like that anyway. But I should have at least offered.
There will be a next time.
I had such a great night.
Just a pretty bowl of cereal.
I went to the local market just to have something to do. Its one of their “sample days” that they do all weekend. So I ate lunch basically. Hehe. I then bought a loaf of clearance cheesy garlic bread. The loaf itself is sort of cut in half lengthwise and they put cheese and garlic stuff on it. I ate about half of that when I got home, I actually didn’t even finish my last piece because I was full. It was super good and really, I never get to just eat bread. So I was cool with the fact that was pretty much all I had for lunch. Hehe.
I was so happy and lovesick at work for my boys that I didn’t eat dinner. I also had such a big lunch that I didn’t care. I just wanted to be around them. I chatted with a friend/coworker of mine who has a crazy diet right now due to being borderline diabetic (because of her recent pregnancy, gestational diabetes I think it’s called…) and told her about some of her options for healthier eating. Then PFH#2 came back and I chatted enthusiastically with him about how AB Tweeted me the other day. I unfortunately couldn’t be on a break the same time as PFH#3 due to the fact that I had to GIVE him all of his breaks (ie- work in his department while he took a break). So that was unfortunate, but we stood around talking every time he came back.
Wednesday I will get another opportunity to work with G and close with him. He will have to take me home. I will let him. And maybe this time I won’t be so stupid as to not invite him up for the evening. Who wants to drive 45 minutes home at 2 AM anyway?
Exercise: 2 mile walk to work, 6.5 hours running around retail job, cardio workout from heart beating so fast getting to talk to my boys all night