Every single time I go out with that man he says things that astound me. And I just fall more and more in love with him. I’m absolutely crazy about him. And I shouldn’t be.
I’m not even divorced yet. I have no business jumping into another relationship. I have no business giving my heart away again so fucking freely. I need to calm down and back off.
Not that he’s giving me any discouraging signs. He’s nothing but absolutely wonderful to me. But I need to hang back for a bit and chill the fuck out.
It’s so hard…
After our movie date Sunday, I will do so. Not that I’ve been particularly aggressive, but I need to give my brain a rest. I seriously can think of nothing but him. And it’s just emotionally exhausting.
We love talking so much. We went to dinner before the movie today and just got so wrapped up in chatting that we were very nearly late. Then after that, once again we got to chatting so much outside in the car that he ended up getting home at around 1:30 AM. I apologize for keeping him, yet he keeps talking and doesn’t seem to mind…I had to of “almost left” the car 5 times before actually leaving because he would jump right back into conversation each time I threatened to go. And every single time he talks I fall in love with him more…
See my predicament?
I’ve told him this too. I’ve told him that every time he talks I adore him more and more.
And yet he keeps talking…
And I just can’t.
If he asks me out, I will always be happy to go out with him. But I will try not to get so depressed in-between. I’m going to do my best to just be casual and let things play themselves out.
I miss him all the time.
I have no pictures of any of my meals. I had a small bowl of cereal for breakfast. A pear for lunch. And about 3/4’s of a Thai chicken salad for dinner. I went on a 5 mile walk for exercise.
I was supposed to take a picture of my cute new outfit, but couldn’t get a good shot. I suck…
How can someone be so incredibly happy and so incredibly sad at the same time?