Food and weight-maintenence blog for the POST diet girl

Archive for the ‘Corn’ Category

Pain

I don’t know what happened.

One second I was helping a customer and the next I’m crying on the floor in MASSIVE amounts of pain.

I’m pretty used to foot cramps. I get them every single morning. I know how to fix them and they don’t really bother me at all.

This was a thousand times worse. This cramp left me completely debilitated. I couldn’t stand. My brain couldn’t focus because I was in so much pain. My customers didn’t know what to do for me. My coworkers didn’t know what to do for me. I didn’t know what to do. I couldn’t get the pain to stop. I can always get these to stop. Why won’t this stop?

I cried. I never cry. I hate showing any form of weakness.

As much as I wished he was there to just touch me and tell me I’d be okay, I’m glad he wasn’t there to see me cry.

This happened 3 times.

I kept having to get help at the cash registers because I would fall in a crumpled mess on the floor and literally could do nothing at all about it. I almost messed up a huge transaction and had to get my drawer counted because I was so blinded with pain that I fucked up. When I could finally stand, I would walk around the store a few times until the pain subsided enough that I could stand in one spot without aggravating it. Then go back to work.

I really wish I could understand what was going on. I’ve never ever had anything like that happen to me before. I didn’t know what to tell my managers. Everyone was incredibly understanding and did their best to help.

Breakfast:

Southwestern-style Scrambled Eggs

Eggs scrambled with fresh corn, tomatoes, mushrooms, chives, garlic and chili powder topped with shredded cheddar cheese and salsa.

Lunch:

Peach Cucumber Salad

This was taken from a website, but I seem to have lost it…its super easy though! Just dice up some cucumber, slice up some peaches, chop up some fresh mint and basil and toss everything with lemon juice! I also added a pinch of salt. VERY refreshing!

And I don’t know why, but my foot cramp lead to a small binge.

Not anything substantial. But enough to be slightly annoying.

I bought a Mediterranean quiche at work and a banana. I thought the potassium might help my foot. I then decided I wanted something from the vending machine. So I bought a small package of peanut butter cookies. Then I wanted another cookie. So I bought a big chocolate chunk cookie from the cafe. Then I decided I wanted a Hostess Apple Pie from the vending machine. Hm. Okay. Well. It could be worse I guess. And when I went home a few hours later I had some granola and yogurt with peaches. I stopped eating when I was full and didn’t want any more. It was nowhere near the point of uncomfortable or a real binge. But all in all I think I was just in physical pain and wanted to make myself feel better with sweets.

I probably won’t have breakfast in the morning.

 

Curiosity!

Incredibly proud of myself! It’s so much easier not to skip meals when I’m at home and HAVE to eat all these fresh fruits and veggies. I hate wasting food so damn much. Also, working makes me hungry.

I was VERY disappointed in myself though for waking up late…my brain didn’t get me up until 7:40!!! Why did it do that?? I went to bed…well…early enough…I mean I was talking with G until 1 AM, but really 5.5 hours of sleep should have been plenty! Sad.

I got my yoga in today. I can’t believe how friggin busy I’ve been lately and how often I’ve been skipping this. It always makes me feel so amazing. My back was just crying to be stretched out. I feel great!

Breakfast:

Strawberries, Peaches, White Nectarines, and Cherries with Greek Yogurt and Granola

GORGEOUS food!!! I’ve missed my beautiful food pictures dearly! So fresh and delicious!

Lunch:

Tomato Salad

2 small Tomatoes, cut into large chunks
1/4 cucumber, cut into large chunks
Fresh Corn, cut off of cob
1 large slice Vadalia Onion, chopped
1 small Carrot, sliced
Fresh chopped Basil
Red Wine and Pomegranate Vinegar
S&P

*With this a also had a small apple. I love my food!!! It’s so pretty!! I’ve missed this so much, it’s good to be back!

Dinner:

Apple Sausage Meatballs with Apple Raisin Wine sauce and Mashed Potatoes

Meatball recipe taken from: http://stolenmomentscooking.com/apple-sausage-balls/

Apple Sausage Balls

3/4 c. flour
1/2 t. baking powder
1/4 t. baking soda
1/4 t. salt
1 lb. bulk pork sausage (original or maple flavored)
2 c. shredded cheddar cheese
2 T. maple syrup
1 apple, peeled and diced
1/8 t. allspice

1. In a large bowl, stir together the flour, baking powder, baking soda and salt. Add the pork sausage, cheese, maple syrup, apple and allspice.
2. Using your hands, combine everything together until all of the ingredients are incorporated. Roll into evenly sized balls, about the size of a golf ball.
3. Place sausage balls on a baking sheet and bake at 375 degrees for 15-20 minutes, until fully cooked.

I made these exactly as instructed!

Sauce:

Loosely based off of: http://www.cooks.com/rec/view/0,1627,156167-245193,00.html

1/2 tsp. salt
1/2 tsp. ground sage (I used fresh)
1/2 tsp. ground black pepper
3 tart apples, sliced
1/2 c. packed brown sugar
2 tbsp. all-purpose flour
1 c. orange juice (I used red wine and apricot preserves for extra sweetness and flavour)
1 tbsp. vinegar
1/2 c. raisins

I sauteed the apples in olive oil for a little while until they started to brown. Then added all the other ingredients and let it reduce.

*I made mashed potatoes with a little cream cheese, milk and S&P. I’m out of butter, so none of that. Which is probably good as I consume far too much butter as it is. As usual, this dish was fantastic! I didn’t want pasta, so I thought the potato was a perfect substitute! Excellent!!! The sage in the apple gravy was the perfect touch!

 

Me being a MASSIVE nerd, I stayed up to watch the rover Curiosity land on Mars. You guys don’t even know. I was freaking out entirely. I wished I had someone to hug. I was so happy it landed safely and nearly cried when it sent the first pictures. I did fall asleep with the computer in my bed, but the second they started streaming the landing on the NASA website and people started talking, it woke me up and I was immediately pumped! I LOVE BEING A NERD!!!

Amazing!!! Fascinating! A rover as big as a car with LASERS is on Mars, people!!!

AND I have a date tomorrow at noon! Shit kids, this is the best night ever!

3 meals!!!

I had 3 meals today!

Granted, I only took pictures of 2 of them.

And then I actually had a second dinner and second dessert…

4 meals?

We eat so badly.

Breakfast:

Strawberry Cream Cheese Crepes

Crepes:

Taken from: http://www.closetcooking.com/2007/09/crepes.html

Ingredients

1/2 cup flour
1 egg
3/4 cup milk
1/8 teaspoon salt
1 tablespoon butter, melted

Directions

1. Mix everything in a large bowl.
2. Pour 1/4 cup of the mixture into a lightly buttered pan heated at medium.
3. Tilt the pan and turn so that the mixture evenly coats the entire bottom of the pan.
4. Cook the crepe until golden brown on the bottom, about 2 minutes.
5. Flip and cook the other side until golden brown.

Filling:

Taken from: http://www.closetcooking.com/2008/06/strawberry-cheesecake-crepe.html

Ingredients:
1 (4 ounce) package cream cheese (softened)
1/4 cup icing sugar
1 tablespoon lemon juice
1 teaspoon lemon zest
1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract
1/2 cup heavy cream
1 batch crepes
4 tablespoons strawberry jam
2 cups strawberries (sliced)

Directions:
1. Mix the cream cheese, icing sugar, lemon juice, lemon zest and vanilla in a bowl.
2. Whip the heavy cream and fold it into the cream cheese mixture.
3. Spread 1 table spoon strawberry jam onto a crepe.
4. Add 1/4 cup of the cream cheese mixture and some strawberries in the crepe, roll and serve.

I was out of milk and had no cream so I used greek yogurt instead. GREAT substitute! These were probably the best crepes I’ve ever made (save for those insane mango ones I made once…but these are better for you.)

Lunch:

I had a PB&J sammich for lunch and an orange.

Dinner:

Sausage and Veggies on Rice

1/4 lb ground Sausage
1/3 c Peas
1 small ear of Corn, cut off cob
Some Onion, diced
1/2 cup Mushrooms, sliced
Shredded Cheddar
Oh crap what did I put in this? Uhhh…OH YEAH
1 T Hoisin sauce
1 T Honey Mustard
A big shake of Cajun Seasoning
S&P to taste

*Yeah I just sorta cooked all that together and put it on some white rice. Once again, very very good! I don’t know how it was, but it was! I mean really good! Go me!!! I also had ice cream for dessert.

I had to walk to work/the post office at some point today. I of course choose to do it during the  convenient time when G will be getting off of work in an hour. I get to work and go to request a day off (date of course), and then go visit him in his department. The crazy bastard hands me his keys so if I want I can wait in his car for him to get off work. I walk a package to the post office, come back to work, throw my bookbag into his car and lay on the pavement listening to music bouncing along to the beat. (It’s such a nice night, I am not waiting in a car…hehe). He calls me “fascinating” as he approaches. I don’t know how…I’m just listening to music outside on a beautiful night…it’s nothing any normal person wouldn’t do, right?

We decide to get coffee at a 24-hour joint.

Coffee turns into us splitting a burger and fries.

2nd dinner turns into us splitting a brownie sundae.

We eat like absolute crap when we’re around each other. And then don’t eat at all when we’re not. Perfect eating disordered couple…

We go back to my place and chat in the car for hours as usual. Eventually we are all over each other and things are fucking amazing.

The end.

Oh he leaves at like, 4:30 AM. Luckily he doesn’t work in the morning. I wouldn’t have visited if I knew he had to get up early though. I’m considerate like that.

Exercise: 2.5 mile walk, 1/2 hour of yoga

One more chance…

PFH#1 has one more chance to win me over. I’m thinking his chances are not very good right now next to how amazing PFH#3 is.

He claimed he wanted to see me today and that he would make time for me. He ended up working all day. “Couldn’t” make time.

How is it that a man who lives 45 minutes away has more time for me than one who lives 10 minutes away?

I’m feeling far more appreciated by #3 right now. And I need to feel appreciated.

I have a date that was planned literally a month in advance with #1 this Saturday. If this falls through on his end for ANY REASON, I will be focusing all of my attention on #3.

Nicole, I know, will be happy to hear this. She has been routing for #3 since day one.

Breakfast:

Parsnip Banana Muffins Pt. 2

AB’s recipe: http://www.foodnetwork.com/recipes/alton-brown/parsnip-muffins-recipe/index.html

Ingredients

  • 1-ounce sliced almonds
  • Nonstick spray
  • 8 1/2 ounces all-purpose flour
  • 1 teaspoon baking powder
  • 3/4 teaspoon baking soda
  • 1/2 teaspoon freshly grated nutmeg
  • 1/2 teaspoon kosher salt
  • 3 whole eggs
  • 3/4 cup plain whole milk yogurt (I used 1 mashed banana instead)
  • 1/4 cup vegetable oil
  • 8 ounces sugar
  • 10 ounces grated parsnips

Directions

Place the almonds in a single layer in a pie pan and place in oven. Heat the oven to 375 degrees F. Bake the nuts until lightly toasted, approximately 20 minutes while the oven heats. Meanwhile, spray a standard 12-cup muffin tin with the nonstick spray and set aside.

Combine the flour, baking powder, baking soda, nutmeg, and salt in the bowl of a food processor, and process for 5 seconds.

Whisk the eggs, yogurt, vegetable oil, and sugar in a large mixing bowl until combined. Add the flour mixture and parsnips, and fold with a spatula until all of the flour is moistened, there will be some lumps. Divide the mixture evenly among the muffin cups using a level 2 1/2-ounce disher or 1/3 cup measure. Sprinkle the top of each muffin with the toasted almonds. Bake for 20 to 25 minutes or until the muffins reach an internal temperature of 210 degrees F and are golden brown, rotating halfway through baking. If needed, use a small knife or offset spatula to loosen the muffins and immediately remove them from the tin to a cooling rack, and cool for 15 minutes. Serve warm. Store completely cooled muffins in an airtight container for up to 3 days.

*I did this all AS DIRECTED BY WEIGHT kids and I’ll tell you the fuck what, it was SO MUCH BETTER. I will be using weight from now on with my baking. I can’t even describe how much better these were than the last time I did them simply by WEIGHING the ingredients! WOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Lunch:

I did not have lunch. Instead I went on a massive 7 mile walk around and bought some supplies. I was bored waiting for something, ANYTHING to happen today. So I went out and made my own adventure.

Dinner:

Beef Fried Rice

I made this marinade and let my “mystery meat” sit in it for 2 hours:

Taken from: http://allrecipes.com/recipe/meat-marinade/

Ingredients

  • 1/2 cup olive oil
  • 1/4 cup soy sauce
  • 1/4 cup Worcestershire sauce
  • 3 tablespoons prepared mustard
  • 2/3 cup lemon juice
  • salt and pepper to taste
  • garlic powder to taste
  • 1 dash onion powder

Directions

  1. Use a flat container large enough to hold meat in a single layer. Combine oil, soy sauce, Worcestershire sauce, mustard and lemon juice. Season with garlic powder, onion powder, salt and pepper. Place meat in the marinade and turn to coat both sides.
  2. Cover and refrigerate for at least 2 hours, shaking or turning meat occasionally.

I used this marinade as a sauce by adding a little cornstarch to the bag and mixing it up. I cut all of the meat into strips and threw it into a stir fry along with carrots, peas, corn and onion. Then I added some cooked brown rice and the marinade and let that heat through. The meat was SO tender!!! YES!!!! It was awesome! I’m learning a lot about meats!

 

It’s going to be a long week until Wednesday when I get to work with G again. I hope I don’t get depressed. I’m trying so hard. I will offer that he stay after he takes me home. I already know neither of us works the next day. He will refuse, but he will know the offer is there. Always. Someday he will take me up on it. I am not bluffing. I never do. If he DOES take me up on it, I may have an interesting story to tell all of you on Thursday.

Exercise: 7 mile walk

Meatless….Tuesday!

Playing catch-up on my Meatless Tuesday!

Which has actually sucked a lot.

Especially with a machine that I’m not used to using.

BUT I get mine back tomorrow! So life is THAT much better.

I worked all day on a project that gave me guff at every turn. I wish things were just easy. But they never ever are. And you never really ever catch up. You just get a LITTLE bit closer to a point where you’re not tearing your hair out with overwhelment. I am at that point. But I’m sure it won’t be for long.

My good day yesterday is still making me smile today, so I think things will be alright.

I may weigh myself next Monday. I’m not sure that I should. I always weigh the least on the first day of my period, so its the one time a month I feel it is the most accurate. If I don’t do it on this day, it doesn’t get done. I did not weigh myself last month. My waist still measures the same. I don’t generally gain a lot of weight in my waist though, I gain it in my legs and butt. I like having a shapely butt, so I don’t care about that. But I miss my thin legs.

I wish it didn’t take having a disorder to keep them thin.

Breakfast:

Felt I needed a savory breakfast after a string of sweet ones. Here I just made a mushroom and green pepper omelet with garlic, diced onions and Italian seasoning. Shredded some mozzarella on top! Didn’t turn out too pretty, but tasted fantastic.

Lunch:

Chinese 5-spice Light Corn Chowder

I dunno what I did here. Sauteed some green peppers with some onion and frozen corn in some olive oil and butter. Added 1/2 cup water and 1/2 cup 2% milk. Added some garlic, Chinese 5-Spice and rosemary. It would have been totally perfect if I didn’t accidentally boil it too hard while it was simmering. That curdled the milk a teeny tiny bit. Otherwise it tasted REALLY really good.

Dinner:

Fried Eggplant and Zucchini with Mushroom Tomato Sauce

I fried slices of eggplant and zucchini that I dredged in an egg/milk mixture and then a panko/cornstarch/flour/Italian seasoning/salt mixture in oil on my stove for about 4 minutes on each side, until brown. I made the sauce out of 1/2 cup crushed tomatoes, 1 T butter, 1/2 cup water, 1/4 of a tomato (diced), sliced mushrooms and onions and maybe more of that green pepper (can’t remember), garlic, olive oil, uh… whatever you’ve got, just throw it in and let it simmer for about half an hour.

The frying worked out AMAZINGLY this time. Everything was crispy on the outside and cooked on the inside. WOW. I mean just wow. And there was SO MUCH FOOD. I only used half of the sauce.

 

I finally FINALLY got back into doing my yoga, which makes me so incredibly happy. I’ve missed it SO very much. I got my Good Eats streaming on the computer and just put it in the windowsill while I stretch out! I can’t always hear it with all the traffic outside, but as long as I know its on, I always have a better yoga experience.

Exercise: 1/2 hour of yoga

Moving

I’m hoping to move into my brother’s within the next week.

The landlord of the apartment had no issues with my self-employment or lack of money at the moment. I explained the situation to him and he’s willing to work with me. I’m going to try and get him a deposit per my dad’s generosity and he’s said he will hold the place for a couple weeks until I’ve got the first month’s rent. All I’d need to do is move my bed, work table and fabric to my brother’s for a little while and work my ass off there until I’ve got the money. The landlord even said he’d prorate the rent for me since I’d only be there for like a week and a half in April. I’m going to do my best to not spend a lot. I will be cutting a lot of costs living over there and I think it will help me a lot.

And of course I need to sell my bike.

That would get rid of 2 of my credit card debts completely. Then I would only have 1.

I’m going to get my bike up on eBay Classifieds as well for a little more exposure. I have to do everything I can to sell this thing.

My husband was up all night with his best friend again last night. I was up from about 3 AM to 4:30AM tossing and turning while all I can hear are drumbeats of music and sporadic loud laughter and singing. I finally got tired of it and went downstairs to look for my earplugs. (My brother gave them to me a while back when I had to share a room with my mom at a hotel…he knows she snores loudly and thought they might be of use to me.) I did find them. Went to the bathroom to wash them off, making it fully clear that I was awake and not happy. Then went back upstairs and was soon dead to the world in a beautiful silence. I let shithead know I was pissed at him the next day and that he was not to speak to me. He says he’s sorry. He’s not sorry. He said he was sorry last time he did this. So if he really was sorry, he wouldn’t keep doing it. He doesn’t give a shit about me.

I’m just overly ready to move on with my life.

Breakfast:

Coconut Oatmeal with Yogurt and Mango

Made half a cup of oatmeal with half coconut milk and half water, plopped on a ton of greek yogurt and diced half a mango and threw it on top. Tossed a little unsweetened coconut on all of that. Perfect little morning pick-me-up that was quick and easy! This way I could get straight to work and not worry about the fact that there are 2 dipshits in the house that I’d rather avoid.

Lunch:

Quinoa and Tuna Salad

Quinoa with tuna, peas, corn, diced red pepper, tomatoes, celery and a little onion with apple cider vinegar, olive oil and splash of lemon juice. S&P to taste and a big dollop of cottage cheese on top. Brilliant! Light, fresh, GREAT for a pre-workout with tons of protein! I couldn’t have been happier!

Dinner:

Mango Chicken

I’ve made this before, though I liked the second version from the weed website more (without the weed), but it required yogurt and I am out now! So I used this one:

http://thaifood.about.com/od/thairecipes/r/mangochicken.htm

Ingredients:

  • (SERVES 4)
  • 2-3 chicken breasts, cut into 2 inch-long pieces (chicken thigh works too)
  • 1 red bell pepper, OR 1 sweet red pepper
  • 1/4 cup oil for pan-frying
  • 1 cup all-purpose flour (or rice flour) mixed with 1/2 tsp. salt
  • 1/4 to 1/2 cup fresh coriander
  • Optional: extra 1/2 to 1 mango, cut into chunks (to finish the dish)
  • Optional: 3-4 Tbsp. coconut milk OR water
  • MANGO SAUCE:
  • 2 fresh ripe mangos, fruit scooped out (or substitute 2 cups frozen or canned mango)
  • 1 red chili, de-seeded and diced, OR 1 tsp. chili sauce OR 1/2 tsp. dried crushed chili
  • 1 Tbsp. rice vinegar (OR white or apple cider)
  • 1+1/2 Tbsp. soy sauce
  • 2 Tbsp. fish sauce
  • juice of 1/2 lime
  • 1 Tbsp. brown sugar
  • 1 thumb-size piece galangal OR ginger, sliced
  • 3 cloves garlic
  • 1/4 tsp. turmeric
  • 2 kaffir lime leaves, snipped into slivers with scissors (discard stem & central vein), OR zest of 1 lime

Preparation:

  1. Place all ‘Mango Sauce’ ingredients in a food processor or blender. Process well, until more or less smooth.
  2. Taste-test the sauce. The goal is to reach a balance of sweet, sour, spicy, and salty. Add more sugar if you find the sauce too sour (this will depend on the sweetness of your mangoes). If not spicy enough, add more chili. If not salty/flavorful enough, add more fish sauce. If too salty or too sweet, add more lime juice. Set aside.
  3. Stir the flour and salt together and place in a mixing-type bowl. Add the chicken pieces and turn or gently stir them to coat.
  4. Heat a wok or frying pan over medium-high heat. Add the oil, then begin frying the chicken pieces. Fry 3-5 minutes per side, or until light golden brown and cooked through. Remove chicken from pan and set on paper towel, or a clean surface.
  5. Wash out the wok/frying pan, or use another (clean) one. Set over medium-high heat and add the mango sauce plus red pepper. Bring to a gentle boil, then reduce to a simmer (medium to low heat). If sauce becomes too thick, add 3-4 Tbsp. water or coconut milk. Simmer 3-4 minutes, or until pepper has softened slightly but still retains some crispness.
  6. Add the fried chicken pieces, gently stirring them in to cover with sauce. If desired, add chunks of mango (fruit of 1/2 to 1 ripe mango) too. Simmer briefly, just until everything is hot.
  7. Do a final taste-test for salt (tasting the sauce together with the chicken). Add a little more fish sauce or chili if desired.
  8. Transfer to a serving dish. Sprinkle with fresh coriander and serve with plenty of Thai jasmine-scented rice. Or, for an extra special treat, with my Easy Coconut Rice.

*I did not fry my chicken in flour. I sliced it up and seared it in oil for a few minutes. Removed it. Then stir fried some onions, red pepper and shiitake mushrooms. I blended all the sauce ingredients in a food processor and dumped them in after the onions were translucent. I cooked this down for a little while. Re-added the chicken and added extra mango cubes. I served this on a little sticky rice. One of my favorites! VERY yum!

 

One of my TV loves, Alton Brown, is on another diet. It’s INCREDIBLY fascinating for me to watch. He Twitters his weight every morning (kind of like I used to do on here) and what he’s eating and whatnot. He says he’s “disgusting” at 175 and wants to lose 10 lbs so he can fit into his tux more comfortably. It’s just absolutely fascinating for me to see someone I admire and look up to, a man nonetheless (proving this is not simply an “unrealistic female-standard” problem) whom I think is gorgeous and totally fuckable as-is, with the same damn body issues as I have. It actually makes me feel better about me, to know that we really are all in this together and that things are going to be fine if we can just gain a little self-confidence. I just have to look at ME the way I look at HIM and say “YES! I too am fuckable as-is!”

TMI?

Somehow, I still feel it works.

Exercise: 1/2 hour of yoga, a little over 1 hour at the gym

What day is it?

The days are just flying by. I want nothing more than more time right now. I just need some time. I wish I was 10 different people so I could get things done faster. I’m going to be spending the day today getting more stock into my online store. I wish I didn’t take on projects that I know are going to be more difficult and yet charge the same price for them. I shouldn’t only make $36 for an entire day’s work. And even then, I don’t make that. I have to buy supplies. I feel a little stuck right now. It will be ok. I will get this project into my store and sell it relatively quickly. I always do. I tend to sell what I make within 1-3 days.

And the cat keeps using me for a springboard. Glad to know I’m useful.

Breakfast:

Peach Bread Pudding with a Strawberry Compote

Adapted from: http://fishfoodblog.com/2009/06/bread-pudding/#comments

 

INGREDIENTS:

1 pound of challah or french bread
1 cup of buttermilk
1 cup of half and half
5 eggs, beaten
1/2 cup sugar
1/2 cup brown sugar
1 teaspoon of cinnamon
1 teaspoon of nutmeg
1 teaspoon of cloves (if using ground cloves, use half the amount)
1 teaspoon of vanilla extract
1 29oz can of peach halves, chopped

Strawberry compote:

4 pints of fresh strawberries
1/2 cup of granulated sugar
2 tablespoons of lime juice

DIRECTIONS:

1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees
2. Spray each ramekin with cooking spray, set aside.
3. Cut the bread into 1/2 inch cubes
4. Mix together eggs, milk, half and half, sugars, spices, and vanilla.
5. Add the bread to the egg mixture and combine until the bread is
soaked thoroughly.
6. Add the chopped peaches, and stir until combined.
7. Fill each ramekin with the bread and peaches until it reaches the top.
8. Set all the ramekins in a roasting pot, and fill with water so it
reaches half way up each ramekin.
9. Bake for 30 – 40 min, or until top is golden brown.

For the Strawberry compote:
1. Combine strawberries, lime juice, and sugar in a blender. Blend
until smooth and serve over top the bread pudding.

*The original called for a raspberry compote, I only had strawberries so that’s what I used. Worked just as well! I used up a lot of stray ingredients in my fridge with this. It was wonderful, although I insist on eating things when they are far too hot. I would have enjoyed this a lot more had I waited an appropriate time for it to cool. Otherwise it was top notch! LOVED the strawberry compote (although its not a real compote, we won’t judge the author too harshly ^_^) and did in fact eat all of it. I used a bit less bread than I should have, so I didn’t feel too bad about eating it all.

Lunch:

Tomato, Almond and Tarragon Soup with Corn and Celery

Once again, a lot of the amounts I put into this elude me, I cannot remember. But I can try!

1.5 cups canned crushed Tomatoes
1/3 cup Coconut Milk
1/2 T Honey
1/4 cup sliced Almonds
1 Roma Tomato, chopped
1/3 cup Corn
1 stalk Celery, sliced
Fresh chopped Tarragon
1 T Tomato Paste
1 t ground Ginger
Crushed Red Pepper to taste
S&P to taste
Uhh…probably other things I am forgetting…

I simmered the crushed tomato, chopped tomato, tomato paste, corn, celery and seasonings for about 15-20 minutes. I blended the coconut milk, almonds and honey with a little olive oil in a food processor until the almonds were well chopped. I added that mixture into the soup and allowed it to warm up and cook through another 5 minutes or so. This was really good! I’m sometimes impressed at what my head can come up with given what I have left in the fridge. I have to get used to using up everything and allowing nothing to go to waste since I will soon be living on my own and probably somewhat poor.

Dinner:

Pistachio Asparagus Pesto Pasta

Taken from: http://www.closetcooking.com/2009/07/pistachio-asparagus-pesto-on-penne.html

(makes 4 servings) Printable Recipe

Ingredients:
1 pound pasta
1 cup pistachio asparagus pesto (see below)
parmigiano reggiano to taste (grated, optional garnish)
asparagus tips (optional garnish)
pistachios (chopped, optional garnish)
Added:
1/2 Zucchini, sliced
1 cup Mushrooms, sliced in half

 

Directions:
1. Cook the pasta in well salted water as directed on the package.
2. When the pasta is cooked to al dente drain the pasta water reserving some of it.
3. Pour the pasta back into the still hot pan, add the pesto and enough of the pasta water to make a smooth sauce that coats the pasta.
4. Serve garnished with parmigiano reggiano, the asparagus tips and some chopped pistachios.

Pistachio Asparagus Pesto

(makes 1 cup pesto)

Ingredients:
1 cup asparagus (cleaned, trimmed, blanched and chopped)
1/4 cup spinach (optional, helps keep the pesto nice and green)
1 clove garlic (chopped)
2 tablespoons pistachios (toasted)
1/4 cup parmigiano reggiano (grated)
3 tablespoons olive oil
lemon juice to taste (optional)
salt to taste

Directions:
1. Place everything into a food processor and blend.

*I put this all on whole wheat penne. I tossed all of the veggies with some olive oil, lemon juice and salt and roasted them in the oven for around 20 minutes at 400…a bit long…15 minutes would have sufficed. I made the pesto exactly as directed (perfect way to use up just the little bit of spinach I had left!) and topped it all with a little extra grated cheese. HOLY SHIT! Yup, this was one of those REALLY impressive recipes! Incredibly fresh and tasty! I finally re-stocked my fridge if you couldn’t tell. I don’t know how, but I managed to eat all of this! It was a TON of food, but it was SO good!

For some reason, my husband bought me chocolate. So I had  a few pieces of that for dessert in lieu of my usual small bowl of ice cream. I don’t ask questions when given free chocolate.

Tomorrow is yet another day of working my butt off…another day where it’s gorgeous outside and I don’t get to go on a walk because I have so much work to do. Another day where I don’t get much farther in the money department…sorry. I don’t mean to be so down. I just want to get out of here so badly and its such a slow process. Maybe I can get some pics taken of my Harley today so I can get it up on Craigslist and whatnot.

P.S. I had a HUGE bag of that chocolate too and didn’t binge on it. I will take my small victories where I can get them!

Exercise: 1/2 hour of yoga, 1 hour at the gym (running went really well today!!)

Nicole and Gwendylon play-date day!!!

EXCITING!

I get to have lunch with Nicole and Gwendylon from nicoleandgwendolyn.com!!! SO very happy!

Start the day early! Lots of work to do before I go out! Glad I did one of those “make-ahead” breakfasts that you let sit in the fridge overnight and bake in the morning! Just add the eggs and pop it in the oven! Brilliant!

Then the phone rings at about 9:30. It’s my mom. She has a doctor’s appointment at 10:00 for an inner ear infection, but she’s managed to throw her back out and can’t drive. I have 5 more minutes on my baking and no way to rely on ex-loser to turn off the oven, I’m also not dressed or look presentable in any way. I ask if she can give me just 5 minutes to get ready. She may be a little late. She says that’s ok.

I throw on some clothes, brush my teeth, make sure the cat is fed. Timer beeps. I take my breakfast out of the oven and turn it off. No time to eat. I grab a book for the waiting room and run out the door. On the way there, I nearly hit a dog and have to slam on my brakes. If I wasn’t completely awake before I am now. Then I am stuck behind a semi-truck that is parked in the middle of the road. Each one of us has to wait for cross traffic to clear so we can go around. SERIOUSLY? Uhg!

I finally make it to my mom’s. At this point its about 8 till 10:00. She says she’s called her doctors office already and they said they couldn’t take her late. She’s had to reschedule. But her back still hurts so bad she thinks she should go to an urgent care. I figure they can also help her with her ear infection and agree whole-heartedly with this plan. I take her to the urgent care, read my book in the waiting room, they send her off with some prescriptions and ask her if I am old enough to drive. (WOW I mean, I look young, but under 16???? I am FLATTERED as I am 29.9 ~_^.) We get some coffee together before picking up the prescriptions to give the pharmacy a little time to fill them. I then take her home.

Is it 1:30 already?? Holy shit.

I eat only half of my breakfast. Lunch is a mere 2 hours away! I don’t want to fill myself up now!

Breakfast:

Baked Oatmeal with Blackstrap Molasses

6 cups old-fashioned rolled oats
2 cups water
1/3 cup kefir, yogurt or whey
1/2 cup vegetable oil or melted butter
1/2 cup applesauce or pumpkin puree (pumpkin is good but will impart a pumpkin flavor)
1/2 cup blackstrap or regular molasses
8-10 large eggs
1 tablespoon cinnamon
2 teaspoons vanilla
1 teaspoon salt
2 teaspoons baking soda
1 cup raisins or other dried diced fruit, optional
1/2 cup nuts, optional

12- to 24-hours before you want to bake this, combine oats, water, kefir, oil, applesauce or pumpkin puree and molasses in a large bowl and stir well to mix.  Let sit on the counter, covered with a tea towel, till you’re ready to bake.

Preheat oven to 350ºF. and grease a 9×13-inch pan or two 8-inch square pans.  Break eggs into a bowl and stir in cinnamon, vanilla, salt and baking soda.  Then pour this mixture into the soaking oatmeal.  Stir well to break up oatmeal and combine ingredients, adding dried fruit and nuts as you’re stirring.  Pour into prepared pan(s) and bake for 30- to 35-minutes till a toothpick inserted in the middle comes out clean.

*I had no applesauce OR pumpkin puree. So I pureed some canned peaches! I almost wish there were MORE peach flavour in this, next time I will add actual little pieces of peach! I did not add any more sugar or honey to this at all. It was perfect the way it was, just enough sweetness for a quick brunch! Letting the oats soak overnight gave them an almost flour-like cake texture! REALLY cool! I will do that more often!

Then it was shower time, errand-running time, and off to lunch!

Nicole and I both had the Mediterranean Salmon Salad! I tried it per her recommendation. We’d both planned on getting the black bean soup, but alas! They were out! So we went for this instead! REALLY great! We sat outside and chatted about our lives, blogs, ED histories, and future plans. She’s just the most amazing, strong, intelligent woman! I hang on every word she says! She never fails to impress me with her optimistic outlook on life and how much knowledge she’s gained from her good and bad experiences alike.  Her desire to help others is something to be admired. She’s dedicated so much of her life and time to people like me. I hope she realizes just how much it means. She amazes me.

Go work out for an hour. My brother gave me a new MP3 player! He didn’t need his old one anymore since he got a fancy shmancy new phone, so I was excited to hear some of the music he had on it! I had a great time bounding along on the elliptical to some new songs! I love my brother’s taste in music, so I knew keeping all of his albums on there would be a good idea! And it was all excellent workout music!

Go home. Is it REALLY 7:00???? And I got nothing done? Oh man…time to start a project! I actually do nearly finish one! In between, I make myself a semi-quick dinner.

Dinner:

Veggie Pot Pie with Cornbread and Gouda topping

I sort of winged a lot of this, so for the filling I used:

Broccoli
Corn
Carrots, diced
Peas
Onion, chopped
Garlic
Cream of Mushroom condensed soup
Sour Cream
2% Milk
Fresh chopped Rosemary
Fresh chopped Sage
S& Lemon P

I sauteed all the veggies in some olive oil for about 10 minutes. I added the CoM soup, a little sour cream, and some milk and just kept adding all 3 in whatever amounts looked and tasted right until it was the creamy consistency that I wanted. I added the herbs and turned off the heat. Then I made the topping which I did take from an online recipe:

Cornbread Gouda topping

Taken from:  http://www.bonappetit.com/recipes/2010/11/mushroom_and_lentil_pot_pies_with_gouda_biscuit_topping

  • 1 cup plus 2 tablespoons all purpose flour
  • 6 tablespoons yellow cornmeal
  • 1 1/4 teaspoons baking powder
  • 1/2 teaspoon salt
  • 4 tablespoons chilled unsalted butter, diced
  • 1/2 cup buttermilk
  • 3/4 cup (packed) coarsely grated Gouda cheese (about 3 ounces)
  • Preheat oven to 400°F. Combine flour, cornmeal, baking powder, and salt in processor; blend 5 seconds. Add butter; pulse until mixture resembles coarse meal. Add buttermilk; pulse until dough forms moist clumps. Turn dough out onto lightly floured surface. Divide into 4 equal pieces; shape each into 2/3-inch-thick disk. Set rounds atop filling; top with cheese.

    Bake pot pies on baking sheet until tester inserted into biscuit topping comes out clean, about 30 minutes

    *I put mine into a small bread pan, topped it with the cornbread mixture and gouda and baked it for the 30 minutes suggested. I ate the whole thing it was so good!! I’m glad I went with the seasonings that I did, it made it different from the norm. Definitely try this with any combination of veggies, meats, or condensed “cream of” soups that you want! It’s so versatile, that’s why I love pot pies!

    So kids, I have a date tomorrow.

    I’m nervous. Should I be nervous? I really want this guy to like me. He’s amazing. He’s always been amazing. He takes really good care of me. Should I be worrying about this right now? Take it slow Mz. P…don’t just jump into the arms of the next guy willing to go out with you…but he’s more than “the next guy”. He’s ALWAYS been “next in line” if you know what I mean. I’ve known him for years and years. I hope we have fun!

    Wish me luck!

    Exercise: Distinct lack of yoga due to parental unit crisis, 1 hour at the gym

Difficult times and eating disorders

I feel extremely lucky.

When I had an eating disorder, my brain wasn’t getting the right nutrients it needed to function properly. In retaliation, my brain inflicted on me a terrible depression among many other issues. I’ve always been an incredibly happy, optimistic, “never-let-anything-get-me-down” type of person. If I wasn’t smiling when I walked into my retail job, people (my co-workers, even regular customers) would immediately ask me if everything was alright. So when I became depressed and shut myself off from the world for a year, it was very apparent that something was wrong. This wasn’t me. Who was this? Who’s mind was living in the same body? Wait…was it even my BODY anymore? I wanted control…but this wasn’t even ME controlling myself now…so what’s the point? How did I let it get so bad that I once again gave up control?

Then 3 months ago I woke up and realized this was no way to live. I started eating real, nutritious foods again. I stopped worrying about calories and started focusing on good fats, protein, potassium, whole grains, vitamins and all those good things I’d been missing. I was so fucking focused on just one number and then wondered why things didn’t add up.

Now I feel absolutely AMAZING. My mind is back to my old self. I’m no longer somebody else. I am happy ALL the time, confident as hell, independent, no one but ME controls me. My body feels great. Looks great. I can take whatever life throws at me and shove it right back into its face.

List of shit I would be going through right now if I still had an eating disorder:

– Crippling depression. I would probably not be leaving the house.

– Severe self-hatred. No one could possibly hate me more than I hated me.

– Severe malnutrition.  I would have probably stopped eating entirely by now. What I would eat would probably be crap on late-night binges.

– Lack of any form of confidence. “My husband doesn’t want me. No one will ever want me. I’m ugly. I’m fat. I’m a mess. I’m going to be alone for the rest of my life.”

– Self-blame. Even though I’d been nothing but an unconditionally loving wife who stood by him through thick and thin, I would have found some way to make this affair my fault. And I would have punished myself mentally and physically for it.

This is not the person you’ve been seeing this past week.

This was the disordered me.

I’m so glad she’s gone. This ordeal would be impossible to manage if she were still here.

I am lucky I woke up when I did.

Breakfast:

Strawberry Ricotta Pancakes with Lemon Walnut Syrup

Taken from:

Ingredients

    • 4 large eggs, separated
    • 2 cups ricotta cheese
    • 2/3 cup sour cream
    • 1 1/3 cups all purpose flour( I used whole wheat)
    • 1 tablespoon baking powder
    • 1/2 teaspoon salt
    • 1/2 teaspoon baking soda
    • 1 1/2 cups whole milk (I used 2%)
  • Melted butter

Preparation

Whisk yolks, ricotta and sour cream in large bowl to blend. Whisk flour, baking powder, salt and baking soda in another large bowl to blend. Add flour mixture to yolk mixture and stir until combined. Stir in milk. Using electric mixer, beat whites in another large bowl on medium speed until soft peaks form. Fold beaten whites into batter. Heat griddle or large skillet over medium heat. Brush with butter. Working in batches, spoon 2 tablespoons batter onto griddle for each pancake. Cook until golden brown, about 3 minutes per side. Serve with maple syrup.

-I also chopped up some strawberries and threw them in. Then I added a little vanilla extract, honey and cinnamon.

Lemon Walnut Syrup

1/3 cup Water
1.5 T Sugar
1 T Lemon Pudding/Pie Filling mix
1/2 T Lemon Juice
More water or juice as needed

Boil water. Dissolve sugar in water. Add lemon pudding mix and lemon juice and cook until thickened. Add more water to thin it out to desired consistency. Serve on top of pancakes with chopped walnuts.

*Yup. Holy crap. I didn’t get to whip the egg whites, but they still came out beautiful! They were delicious and not terrible for me! The whole wheat was a great idea, it was perfect with the lemon and strawberry! I would love to try and whip the egg whites next time, but honestly I didn’t need to. ^_^

Lunch:

Veggie Mix “Salad”

I needed something quick before going for a walk, so I microwaved some frozen peas and corn with some sliced carrots and baby spinach for about 4 minutes in a bit of water. After they were done, I drained them, added some chopped onion, Feta cheese, a little apple cider vinegar, about 1 t margarine, 1/4 t Chinese 5-spice, lemon juice, salt and pepper.  It was wonderful! Nice and light for an afternoon walk! Yum yum!

Dinner:

Apple Cheddar Meatballs with Red Wine BBQ Apple sauce

Apple Cheddar Meatballs

Adapted from: http://sweetluvininthekitchen.blogspot.com/2011/06/apple-cheddar-meatalls.html

Ingredients
1 pound ground turkey or pork (I used lean beef)
1 cup sharp cheddar cheese, grated
3/4 cup breadcrumbs (I used quick-cook oats)
1 small, tart apple, such as granny smith, peeled and grated
1/2 small onion, grated
1/2 cup chopped parsley (Instead I used mint and tarragon)
1 egg, beaten
1 1/2 tsp. salt
1/4 tsp. pepper
I also added cinnamon and a pinch of ground clove

Mix all ingredients together with your hands. Mold into small balls and place on an oiled baking sheet. Bake at 400 for 25 minutes, turning the meatballs halfway through.

While these were baking, I made some vegetable linguini. I was going to make couscous (next time I probably will) but I wanted the good vitamins and nutrients out of the vegetable linguini.

Red Wine BBQ Apple Sauce:

Ingredients
1/4 cup Red Wine
1/8 cup BBQ Sauce (I used a Michigan Cherry one for more fruit flavour)
1.5 T Teriyaki Sauce
A splash of Brandy
1 T Applesauce (or in my case I actually processed some extra apple chunks into mine)
1/2 small Apple, sliced
1/2 T chopped Tarragon
Pinch of Cardamom
1.5 T Brown Sugar
S&P to taste

I blended all the sauce ingredients in a processor except for the sliced apples. I poured the sauce into a pan, added the apples,  and allowed it to reduce a bit until it was the thickness I wanted. I added some baby spinach and allowed that to wilt. I took it off of the heat and poured it on top of the meatballs and vegetable linguini.

*I always enjoy my apple and meat combinations. I miss my Captain Morgan’s Tattoo rum (my husband doesn’t even like it, but drank it all one night when he was desperate), it goes SO well in apple sauces. I always try to compensate with other alcohols and it never matches the awesome spices in that particular dark rum. Otherwise, if you had nothing to compare this to, it would be really amazing hehe!

I finally called my dad today. I had to break it to him that I was getting a divorce for the same reason my mother divorced him. It was really hard for him to take. He wants to see me for dinner sometime this week. We will talk over possible money/finance issues during that time. He knows I’ll pay him back, but I doubt he’ll take my money. He doesn’t need it. He can afford to give me $400 for a deposit. And even then, he’ll get it back when I eventually move out of my apartment.

I hope to get an apartment that faces East so I can watch the sunrise. This is the only luxury I am asking for. A window to the East. I hope it isn’t too much to ask…

Selling my Harley

As a way to get the hell out of here and into my own awesome little place, I’m selling my Harley Davidson.

This makes me EXTREMELY sad.

There’s a million reasons why this is the very best option for me though. If I sell it, I won’t have to shell out extra for garage space in an apartment (a lot of them don’t even allow motorcycles), I can save the money on the insurance, and really I plan on living in an area where I can walk everywhere. Ultimately when it comes down to it, don’t need it. Also, I can pay off a lot of my credit card debt with the money I make from it so I can start from scratch again.

I’m still going to ask my dad if he can help me with a security deposit though. Even if I sell the bike I could really use the help…and he’s rich. I think he’ll be willing to give me $400 for a deposit. I’d even be willing to pay him back if he wanted. I’ve done it before. Actually, I’ve only ever asked my dad for money once before, and even then it was a loan which I have since paid back. I NEVER ask my dad for money. Though I have a feeling that he may feel….obligated to help me in this situation. My mom left him because he had not one, but two affairs. It would be good karma for him to help me right now.

I’m hoping to be out of here within a couple weeks. It was originally planned for maybe a month or two.

Breakfast:

Lemon Ricotta Souffle Pancakes with Banana and Walnuts

Adapted from: http://sweetsavoryplanet.blogspot.com/2011/05/lemon-ricotta-souffle-pancakes-with.html

3/4 cup (75 g) of all purpose flour
1/3 cup (63 g) of sugar
1/2 teaspoon salt
4 eggs separated
4 tablespoons of unsalted butter (2 melted and 2 for the pan) (I did not use extra butter on the pan, I just sprayed it with oil)
2/3 cup (165 g) of ricotta, whole or part skim
1/4 cup (60 ml) of lemon juice
zest of a lemon
1/2 teaspoon of vanilla
1/4 cup (42 g) of fresh or frozen berries (I used sliced bananas and chopped walnuts)
Turbinado or raw sugar for sprinkling over the top
Confectioners sugar for a light dusting
A light maple syrup or Lyle’s golden syrup

Preheat the oven to 375 degrees and preheat a 10-inch iron skillet or saute pan.

Mix flour, sugar and salt in a bowl.

Mix eggs yolks, drained ricotta, butter, lemon juice, zest vanilla in a large bowl and mix well.

Place the separated egg whites in a mixing bowl and whisk to stiff peaks.

Add the flour mixture to the wet mixture and combine well.  Add a small dollop of the egg whites and mix in to lighten the batter.  Add the remaining egg whites and fold in with a spatula until combined.

Remove the pan from the oven and put 2 tablespoons of butter it it.  When the butter has melted add batter, sprinkle a few berries across the top and sprinkle on about a tablespoon or 2 of turbinado sugar. Return the pan to the oven.  Bake for 20 to 25 minutes.  When the pancake is puffed and lightly browned on top it is ready.

Serve with a light sprinkling of confectioners sugar and serve with syrup of choice.

Enjoy!

*This was an awesome way to use up the last half of banana that I had! This turned out so much thicker and fluffier than I thought it would. There seemed to be such a small amount of batter, then I folded in the beaten egg whites and it really made a massive difference! DO THIS step!

Lunch:

Black Bean Soup

1.5 cups Beef Stock
3/4 cup Black Beans (I used canned)
1 small Carrot, shredded
1/3 cup Corn
1/4 Onion, chopped
1 small clove Garlic, grated/minced
1/2 t Cumin
1/2 T Chili Paste
1/2 T Lime Juice
1 Bay Leaf
Fresh chopped Parsley
Dollop of Sour Cream
1 T Olive Oil
S&P to taste

Heaven knows I’ve probably missed something! I added the beef stock first along with about 1/3 cup of black beans and let it simmer for about 5 minutes. I took a potato masher and mashed up the beans into the stock. I added the rest of the beans, carrot, corn, garlic, cumin, chili paste, lime juice, bay leaf and parsley. I let that simmer, uncovered, for about 15 minutes. I added S&P. I took it off the heat and threw half of it into a food processor and pureed it. Then added it back into the rest of the soup. Throw in a dollop of sour cream and mix it in. Yeah this soup was ridiculously delicious! I LOVE black beans! GREAT form of protein and an awesome energy boost before working out!

Dinner:

Strawberry Balsamic Chicken

Adapted from: http://allrecipes.com/recipe/strawberry-balsamic-chicken/

Ingredients

4 (8 ounce) containers strawberry yogurt
1/2 cup balsamic vinegar
1 tablespoon white sugar (I only needed half the amount of sugar since I had a honey sweetened Greek yogurt)
1 tablespoon ground black pepper
1 teaspoon ground cinnamon
1 teaspoon kosher salt
4 skinless, boneless chicken breast halves
2 tablespoons olive oil
1 teaspoon lemon juice
4 large strawberries
2 teaspoons minced fresh parsley
1 teaspoon minced fresh mint leaves
1 tablespoon balsamic vinegar (optional)
Added:
1/2 cup Mushrooms
Fresh chopped Tarragon

I seared strips of chicken in olive oil, salt and pepper until cooked through. I blended together the yogurt, 2 strawberries, balsamic, lemon juice, the cinnamon, sugar and salt in a processor. When the chicken was done, I removed it from the pan, but used the remaining oil, juices to sautee the onions and mushrooms. I also added the parsley, mint and tarragon to the sautee. When the onions were translucent, I dumped the yogurt/balsamic mixture in along with 4 sliced strawberries. I allowed that to cook down for about 10 minutes or so. I added a tiny bit of flour to thicken it up but you don’t have to do that if you like a thinner sauce. When the sauce was done, I took it off of the heat, threw in the chicken and coated them in sauce, then put it all on some brown rice.

*I adore this recipe. I’ve made it a few times in my day and I usually make it just a little different every time. I think strawberries and chicken are a great combo, fruit and chicken tend to be pretty amazing together. I was in a creamy sauce sort of mood tonight and this was delicious!

Well I lost an hour of work today due to the time change. So I’d better get to bed so that I can get up nice and early! Love you all, I’ve got SO much work to do in the next few days. I hope I can get that bike sold quickly…as much as I don’t want to sell it, it’s going to be a HUGE help in the end.

Is it bad that I’m far more sad to part with my Harley and my cat than I am to part with my husband?

Exercise: 1/2 hour of yoga, 1 hour at the gym