Food and weight-maintenence blog for the POST diet girl

Archive for the ‘Peas’ Category

Restraint

I made sort of a lavish breakfast this morning as I have these apples I must use. I was very proud of myself in that I didn’t smash on the entire batch. I also didn’t necessarily TRY to limit myself. While I was eating them, I decided, “I am full. I do not wish to eat any more.” I put the rest into a ziplock bag and froze them for another time. I am happy with this seemingly small accomplishment. Listening to our bodies is so much harder than it’s made out to be.

Breakfast:

Apple Breakfast Puffs

Taken from: http://www.mangiodasola.com/2009/10/apple-breakfast-puffs.html

3 cups AP flour
3 teaspoons baking powder
1 teaspoon salt
1/2 teaspoon ground nutmeg
1 cup sugar
2/3 cup shortening (Crisco)
2 eggs
1 cup milk (I used buttermilk)
1 1/2 cups sugar
3 teaspoons cinnamon
2 sticks butter
1 apple (peeled, cored, and diced into small cubes)

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Lightly grease 12 muffin cups (I used “Baker’s Joy”, like Pioneer Woman). Stir together flour, baking powder, salt, and nutmeg. Whisk mixture, and set aside.

In a different bowl (I used the stand mixer bowl), cream together sugar and shortening, then add eggs and mix. Add flour mixture and buttermilk alternately to creamed mixture, beating (until the flour is mostly incorporated) after each addition and ending with the flour. Fold in chopped apples. (Make sure you do not overmix so that the puffs do not come out tough.)

Fill prepared muffin cups 2/3 full. Bake at 350 for 20-25 minutes or until golden. In a bowl, melt 1 1/2 sticks butter. In a separate bowl, combine sugar and cinnamon. Dip baked muffins in butter, coating thoroughly, then coat with cinnamon-sugar mixture.

*I made these into mini-muffins, sort of doughnut hole style! They were slightly overbaked, but otherwise addictive! I have all sorts of new baking pans and still have yet to get used to them. I also desperately need an oven thermometer. That would greatly help my oven temperature situation.

Lunch:

I also had a little applesauce with this. But not a lot.

After my sammich, I went on a massively long ass walk. There’s always so much I need to friggin do, I swear. I will have my car back so very soon, I keep telling myself. I love to walk, but it will save me so much time if sometimes I had my car. It normally takes me about 3 hours to walk (what would be) a 10 minute drive up the street, shop for supplies, walk to the grocery store, shop for food, then walk home. In the end, if I had a car and needed the time more than I needed the exercise, I could have all of this done in about 1 hour. I really need my car.

Dinner:

Cashew and Coconut Milk Curry with Chicken and Peas

I wrote down everything I put into it. I’m getting MUCH better at that! I wanted to put A LOT more peas into this dish, but ran out, so I substitutes with the little bit of broccoli I had left. I will write what I WANTED in this as opposed to what I actually used.

Peanut Oil
1 boneless, skinless Chicken breast, cubed
Onion, sliced
1/2 cup Peas
1 t Mustard Seed
1/2 T Cumin
1/2 T Garam Masala
1 t Cayenne Pepper (I like my stuff hot, you may choose to use less)
1 t Onion Powder
1/2 c Cashews, divided
1 t Sugar
1/2 c Coconut Milk
1/3 c Crushed Tomatoes
1 T Tomato Paste
1/3 c Chicken Stock (or however much you feel you want in it to thin your sauce out)
1 T Honey
S&P
Lime juice (garnish)
Sour Cream (garnish)

Blend 1/4 – 1/3 cup of the cashews in a food processor with about 1 t of sugar until smooth (like peanut butter). This may take a while (but totally worth it).  Cook the chicken in peanut oil until no longer pink in the middle. Remove from pan and set aside. Cook the onions, peas, reserved cashews, and mustard seed in the same pan until the onions become translucent and the mustard seeds start to pop (you may add more peanut oil if necessary). Add other spices and cook about 1 minute longer. Add coconut milk, cashew butter, crushed tomatoes, tomato paste and honey. Cook to desired thickness on medium heat. If you should want the sauce a bit thinner, add chicken stock. Add chicken back into the pan and heat through. Sprinkle on some fresh lime juice and serve on sticky rice with a dollop of sour cream.

*One of the very best concoctions I do. I love adding cashew butter to dishes! It is very Indian-style and I would have served it on Basmati rice if I had any. Toasting the spices before adding the liquids helps to release the flavour and aromatics, so don’t skip this step! Someday, I would like to buy my spices for these dishes whole and grind them myself. I am working on being rich enough to do this on a consistent basis.

It was nice to get a lot of things done today errand-wise, but I did not get as much work done for my business as I would have hoped. Then again, I spent my morning making mini-muffins instead of working, knowing full well my errands would suck up a large portion of my time today. Well, the joy of baking simply MUST take precedence every once in a while to keep one sane!

Exercise: 8 mile walk

MMUM not fail!

At least I got this part right! Sheesh!

BUT I finally lost it. I finally said to myself, “Self, nobody wants to see YET ANOTHER picture of  the same cereal in the same bowl and a PB&J sammich with the same grape jelly and crunchy peanut butter. NOBODY!”

So I protested taking pictures of those same things. Again. You kids probably feel like you’re on a broken record by now with this place.

I worked a lot this morning. Shipped out a couple of things. Expected a visit from my darling at around 5:20 or so. (Just a short visit, he’d left something here by accident that he needed to pick up.) When he arrives, I can tell something is very, very wrong. He looked like he was outright miserable. He had a migraine and just wanted to sit, relax, and let it pass. This was more than alright with me. I closed all of the curtains in my living room and just held his hand and talked to him while he rested. The migraine passed relatively quickly. He told me I must be good for him. That I have magical healing powers. He’s so beautiful.

That was my adventure for the day.

Dinner:

Pumpkin, Peas, and Red Peppers in a Cashew, Coriander, and Coconut sauce

I jotted down the ingredients this time so I couldn’t forget. YES! I will get better at doing that! Some of these turn out incredible and I really would like to share!

Onion, diced
Red pepper, chopped
1 clove Garlic, minced
Fresh grated Ginger
1/4 small roasted Pumpkin, cubed
1/4 c Peas
0.5 T Coriander
0.5 t Cayenne pepper
1 t Garam Masala
0.5 t Turmeric
Cashews
Crushed Tomatoes
Olive Oil
Lime Juice
1/8 c Coconut
Sprinkle of Sugar

Cook the onion, garlic, ginger and red pepper in some olive oil until red pepper becomes tender. Add peas and spices. Meanwhile, put a handfull of cashews into a food processor and blend until very fine, if you have the patience, until it becomes a paste. Add coconut and process with cashews until well blended. Add crushed tomatoes (about…1/4 cup) and a dash of lime juice and pulse once or twice. Add mixture to the pan along with the diced, roasted pumpkin and some extra whole cashews. Cook until pumpkin is heated through. Serve on sticky rice.

*Very, very good! Lots of coriander flavor without covering up the flavor of the veggies/pumpkin too much. I liked showcasing the coriander, it is normally sort of an afterthought spice in curry, so it was nice to let it shine! Made it different than I’m used to!

 

I was happy that I didn’t say anything stupid today. I feel as though I get so nervous, as my boyfriend is, very honestly, a lot smarter than I am, that I say really stupid things whilst talking with him. My brain turns to mush and I temporarily forget things that I KNOW I know.  You know? Then I feel as though he’s going to realize I’m actually an ignorant idiot posing as an intelligent young woman.  I ought to just shut up and look pretty so he doesn’t suspect that I’m a complete moron. I did good today though. I just sort of talked at him about my day softly and in a low tone so he could just sort of relax to the sound of my voice. It worked. And I didn’t say one stupid thing. I feel I’ve made up for the REALLY extra dumb comments I’ve made in the past couple of days.

Curing migraines is a great way to show that you’re worth keeping around. Even if sometimes you’re slightly stupid.

 

Friends walking in on you naked

Well, I sort of invite that sort of thing. Being that I leave my doors unlocked and all.

It started off normally enough with breakfast:

Pineapple and Yogurt on Cardamom Oatmeal

I made oatmeal with milk and pineapple juice instead of water, then I added brown sugar, a pinch of salt and a large pinch of cardamom. I topped it with some pineapple chunks and a big dollop of greek yogurt. Indulgent!!!

Lunch:

Boring PB&J. But always yummy!

Dinner:

While it doesn’t look like it, this is one of my go-to easy recipes with BBQ sauce and honey mustard!

BBQ and Honey Mustard Stir Fry

Adapted from: http://www.frenchs.com/recipe/honey-mustard-bbq-chicken-stir-fry-RE0476

Ingredients:

1 box (10 ounces) couscous pasta

1 pound boneless skinless chicken, cut into strips (No chicken, so I used mushrooms and peas!)

1 medium red bell pepper, cut into thin strips

1 medium onion, sliced

1/3 cup FRENCH’S® Honey Dijon Mustard or FRENCH’S® Honey Mustard

1/3 cup CATTLEMEN’S® Award Winning Classic Barbecue Sauce

Directions:

Prepare couscous according to package directions. Keep warm.

Heat 1 tablespoon oil in large nonstick skillet over medium-high heat. Stir-fry chicken in batches 5 to 10 minutes until or until browned. Transfer to bowl. Drain fat.

Heat 1 tablespoon oil in same skillet until hot. Stir-fry vegetables 3 minutes until crisp-tender. Return chicken to skillet. Stir in 2/3 cup water, mustard and barbecue sauce. Heat to boiling, stirring often. Serve over couscous.

*This is a good comfort food for me for some reason. I just love BBQ sauce! I also wanted to be sure to EAT something just in case G came over after work and we’d end up going out “just for coffee” but would end up ordering food as well…if I go when I’m not hungry hopefully I’ll hold off on the food ordering!

I took a shower after dinner (once again, just in case) and had music up somewhat loud. While I was in my room trying to find something to wear, a close friend of mine walks into my apartment. I don’t hear her at all as my music is too loud, so she has to yell at me to get my attention! I decide I might as well thrown on a towel (even though with this friend it TOTALLY doesn’t even matter) and we sit at my kitchen table and talk for a few minutes. She decides she wants to go crash my work and steal G since he’ll be getting out of there in about an hour. We go and he is absolutely delighted to see us! It always makes me so happy to be around him! He tells me how much he’s missed me and how he was hoping I would visit or put a note on his car. I like very much that we can share these things with each other now! We ask him if he’d like to get coffee with us after he gets out of work. He accepts and meets us later at the restaurant. He and my friend get along wonderfully! We have a fabulous time and chat late into the night.

My friend eventually has to leave and asks G if it is ok for him to take me home. (Of course it is.) So he and I hang out for a while longer talking and talking and talking. You can’t get us to shut the hell up. The only 2 things that have consistently worked to get us to stop talking is good food or making out. And even that second part is a bit inconsistent on the conversational part…sometimes we talk while we’re doing that too…

He leaves around 5. He of course won’t stay. I of course don’t understand why.

3 meals!!!

I had 3 meals today!

Granted, I only took pictures of 2 of them.

And then I actually had a second dinner and second dessert…

4 meals?

We eat so badly.

Breakfast:

Strawberry Cream Cheese Crepes

Crepes:

Taken from: http://www.closetcooking.com/2007/09/crepes.html

Ingredients

1/2 cup flour
1 egg
3/4 cup milk
1/8 teaspoon salt
1 tablespoon butter, melted

Directions

1. Mix everything in a large bowl.
2. Pour 1/4 cup of the mixture into a lightly buttered pan heated at medium.
3. Tilt the pan and turn so that the mixture evenly coats the entire bottom of the pan.
4. Cook the crepe until golden brown on the bottom, about 2 minutes.
5. Flip and cook the other side until golden brown.

Filling:

Taken from: http://www.closetcooking.com/2008/06/strawberry-cheesecake-crepe.html

Ingredients:
1 (4 ounce) package cream cheese (softened)
1/4 cup icing sugar
1 tablespoon lemon juice
1 teaspoon lemon zest
1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract
1/2 cup heavy cream
1 batch crepes
4 tablespoons strawberry jam
2 cups strawberries (sliced)

Directions:
1. Mix the cream cheese, icing sugar, lemon juice, lemon zest and vanilla in a bowl.
2. Whip the heavy cream and fold it into the cream cheese mixture.
3. Spread 1 table spoon strawberry jam onto a crepe.
4. Add 1/4 cup of the cream cheese mixture and some strawberries in the crepe, roll and serve.

I was out of milk and had no cream so I used greek yogurt instead. GREAT substitute! These were probably the best crepes I’ve ever made (save for those insane mango ones I made once…but these are better for you.)

Lunch:

I had a PB&J sammich for lunch and an orange.

Dinner:

Sausage and Veggies on Rice

1/4 lb ground Sausage
1/3 c Peas
1 small ear of Corn, cut off cob
Some Onion, diced
1/2 cup Mushrooms, sliced
Shredded Cheddar
Oh crap what did I put in this? Uhhh…OH YEAH
1 T Hoisin sauce
1 T Honey Mustard
A big shake of Cajun Seasoning
S&P to taste

*Yeah I just sorta cooked all that together and put it on some white rice. Once again, very very good! I don’t know how it was, but it was! I mean really good! Go me!!! I also had ice cream for dessert.

I had to walk to work/the post office at some point today. I of course choose to do it during the  convenient time when G will be getting off of work in an hour. I get to work and go to request a day off (date of course), and then go visit him in his department. The crazy bastard hands me his keys so if I want I can wait in his car for him to get off work. I walk a package to the post office, come back to work, throw my bookbag into his car and lay on the pavement listening to music bouncing along to the beat. (It’s such a nice night, I am not waiting in a car…hehe). He calls me “fascinating” as he approaches. I don’t know how…I’m just listening to music outside on a beautiful night…it’s nothing any normal person wouldn’t do, right?

We decide to get coffee at a 24-hour joint.

Coffee turns into us splitting a burger and fries.

2nd dinner turns into us splitting a brownie sundae.

We eat like absolute crap when we’re around each other. And then don’t eat at all when we’re not. Perfect eating disordered couple…

We go back to my place and chat in the car for hours as usual. Eventually we are all over each other and things are fucking amazing.

The end.

Oh he leaves at like, 4:30 AM. Luckily he doesn’t work in the morning. I wouldn’t have visited if I knew he had to get up early though. I’m considerate like that.

Exercise: 2.5 mile walk, 1/2 hour of yoga

One more chance…

PFH#1 has one more chance to win me over. I’m thinking his chances are not very good right now next to how amazing PFH#3 is.

He claimed he wanted to see me today and that he would make time for me. He ended up working all day. “Couldn’t” make time.

How is it that a man who lives 45 minutes away has more time for me than one who lives 10 minutes away?

I’m feeling far more appreciated by #3 right now. And I need to feel appreciated.

I have a date that was planned literally a month in advance with #1 this Saturday. If this falls through on his end for ANY REASON, I will be focusing all of my attention on #3.

Nicole, I know, will be happy to hear this. She has been routing for #3 since day one.

Breakfast:

Parsnip Banana Muffins Pt. 2

AB’s recipe: http://www.foodnetwork.com/recipes/alton-brown/parsnip-muffins-recipe/index.html

Ingredients

  • 1-ounce sliced almonds
  • Nonstick spray
  • 8 1/2 ounces all-purpose flour
  • 1 teaspoon baking powder
  • 3/4 teaspoon baking soda
  • 1/2 teaspoon freshly grated nutmeg
  • 1/2 teaspoon kosher salt
  • 3 whole eggs
  • 3/4 cup plain whole milk yogurt (I used 1 mashed banana instead)
  • 1/4 cup vegetable oil
  • 8 ounces sugar
  • 10 ounces grated parsnips

Directions

Place the almonds in a single layer in a pie pan and place in oven. Heat the oven to 375 degrees F. Bake the nuts until lightly toasted, approximately 20 minutes while the oven heats. Meanwhile, spray a standard 12-cup muffin tin with the nonstick spray and set aside.

Combine the flour, baking powder, baking soda, nutmeg, and salt in the bowl of a food processor, and process for 5 seconds.

Whisk the eggs, yogurt, vegetable oil, and sugar in a large mixing bowl until combined. Add the flour mixture and parsnips, and fold with a spatula until all of the flour is moistened, there will be some lumps. Divide the mixture evenly among the muffin cups using a level 2 1/2-ounce disher or 1/3 cup measure. Sprinkle the top of each muffin with the toasted almonds. Bake for 20 to 25 minutes or until the muffins reach an internal temperature of 210 degrees F and are golden brown, rotating halfway through baking. If needed, use a small knife or offset spatula to loosen the muffins and immediately remove them from the tin to a cooling rack, and cool for 15 minutes. Serve warm. Store completely cooled muffins in an airtight container for up to 3 days.

*I did this all AS DIRECTED BY WEIGHT kids and I’ll tell you the fuck what, it was SO MUCH BETTER. I will be using weight from now on with my baking. I can’t even describe how much better these were than the last time I did them simply by WEIGHING the ingredients! WOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Lunch:

I did not have lunch. Instead I went on a massive 7 mile walk around and bought some supplies. I was bored waiting for something, ANYTHING to happen today. So I went out and made my own adventure.

Dinner:

Beef Fried Rice

I made this marinade and let my “mystery meat” sit in it for 2 hours:

Taken from: http://allrecipes.com/recipe/meat-marinade/

Ingredients

  • 1/2 cup olive oil
  • 1/4 cup soy sauce
  • 1/4 cup Worcestershire sauce
  • 3 tablespoons prepared mustard
  • 2/3 cup lemon juice
  • salt and pepper to taste
  • garlic powder to taste
  • 1 dash onion powder

Directions

  1. Use a flat container large enough to hold meat in a single layer. Combine oil, soy sauce, Worcestershire sauce, mustard and lemon juice. Season with garlic powder, onion powder, salt and pepper. Place meat in the marinade and turn to coat both sides.
  2. Cover and refrigerate for at least 2 hours, shaking or turning meat occasionally.

I used this marinade as a sauce by adding a little cornstarch to the bag and mixing it up. I cut all of the meat into strips and threw it into a stir fry along with carrots, peas, corn and onion. Then I added some cooked brown rice and the marinade and let that heat through. The meat was SO tender!!! YES!!!! It was awesome! I’m learning a lot about meats!

 

It’s going to be a long week until Wednesday when I get to work with G again. I hope I don’t get depressed. I’m trying so hard. I will offer that he stay after he takes me home. I already know neither of us works the next day. He will refuse, but he will know the offer is there. Always. Someday he will take me up on it. I am not bluffing. I never do. If he DOES take me up on it, I may have an interesting story to tell all of you on Thursday.

Exercise: 7 mile walk

Paris

G desperately wants to go to France.

He will never go.

I know how normal people work. They say they want to do something. They dream about it. They talk about it. They long for it. But they never do it. They don’t think they can.

I will never understand why people do this to themselves.

Why can’t you?

Why the fuck can’t you?

“I don’t have the money.”

“I don’t have the time.”

“I can’t leave work for that long.”

“-Insert significant other’s name here- doesn’t want to.”

Excuses, excuses, fucking lame ass excuses.

This is the only goddamn life you have people. You don’t get a second chance. Do you really want to look back on your life and regret all the things you COULD HAVE DONE had you JUST DONE THEM?

I am taking G to Paris.

I bought a sewing machine not knowing how to sew with dreams of being self-employed. I learned how. I bought a motorcycle without knowing how to ride, but a strong desire to hit that open road with the wind blowing through my hair. I took classes and DID it. I have traveled all over the US on no money. I have been to London being self-employed, barely able to afford rent half the time. I have met all my heroes. My life is a massive adventure.

G pointed this out to me at the movie the other night.

I told him that it doesn’t just come to me. I have to make the choice to live. YOU have to go to IT, adventures won’t just happen to you. If you really want something, you have to just make the decision to DO it. I haven’t failed yet. I’ve succeeded in everything I’ve tried because I have FAITH in myself and my ability to learn and do.  And I’ve no regrets.

I’ve been looking at flight prices and B&B’s in Paris. It’s not even all that expensive. It’s completely doable. Sure I’ll have to work my ass off and save every penny I can for maybe a year (depending on if I plan on paying for the both of us, which I know he won’t let me), but I CAN DO IT. If he wants to pitch in, he is more than welcome to. But I will be giving him a timeline and very soon possibly an exact date (that depends on the flexibility of the airline prices and if I check every day) and am saying “I am taking you to Paris.”

He will try to protest.

I will explain to him that he’s the luckiest man in the world because he has me. Without me, he won’t go. With me in his life, anything is possible. Because that’s exactly what I believe about myself.

I said something to him the other day that he wants to get engraved so he can see it every day. He’d mentioned how he loves to write, but the industry has gotten him down and he hasn’t submitted any of his writing or even had anyone read it in nearly a decade. I told him he shouldn’t let that stop him from doing what he loves.

“Holding back passion is the first step to unhappiness.”

He told me I am 100% right and that I am an inspiration to him.

It’s nice to be someone’s muse.

I demanded to read his writings. He will be giving me copies soon.

Breakfast:

Traditional French Clafoutis

Quite obviously, I’ve been inspired today with French cooking. I’ve done this before, but not the traditional way with cherries. I happen to have them today.

Taken from: http://www.joyofbaking.com/breakfast/CherryClafoutis.html

Cherry Clafoutis Batter:

1/2 cup (65 grams) all purpose flour

1/4 teaspoon salt

2 large eggs

2 tablespoosn (25 grams) granulated white sugar

3/4 cup (180 ml) milk (whole (full fat) or reduced fat)

1 tablespoon melted butter

1/2 teaspoon pure vanilla extract

Cherries:

3/4 pound (350 grams) fresh sweet cherries, pitted

1 tablespoon (13 grams) unsalted butter

1 tablespoon (15 grams) granulated white sugar

Preheat the oven to 425 degrees F (220 degrees C) and place the rack in the center of the oven.  Wash the cherries, remove the stems and pits. 

In your food processor or blender (or you can do it by hand with a wire whisk) place the flour, salt, eggs, sugar, milk, butter, and vanilla extract. Process for about 60 seconds, scraping down the sides of the bowl as needed. Once the batter is completely smooth, let it rest while you prepare the fruit. 

In a 9- inch (23 cm) heavy ovenproof skillet (preferably non stick), melt the butter over medium heat making sure the melted butter coats the bottom and sides of the pan. When the butter is bubbling, add the pitted cherries, and cook until the cherries have softened a bit and are coated with butter (about 2 minutes). Then sprinkle the cherries with the sugar and cook until the sugar has dissolved and turns into a syrup (1 – 2 minutes). Pour the batter over the cherries and bake for about 18-20 minutes or until the clafoutis is puffed, set, and golden brown around the edges. Do not open the oven door until the end of the baking time or it may collapse. Serve immediately with a dusting of confectioners sugar and yogurt, creme fraiche or softly whipped cream.

Serves about 4 people as a breakfast/brunch dish

*Fantastic! Easy. RIDICULOUSLY easy. Custardy, sweet (but not “too sweet” for people who are into that hehe), and almost too simple for how good it tastes. I’m hoping one day I can make this for breakfast for G in Paris.

Lunch:

Finished off that turkey. Banana. Yum.

Dinner:

Sweet Potato, Parsnip and Pea Stir Fry

This was something I totally made up. I sauteed sweet potato, parsnips and peas with onion, diced tomato and a lot of garlic in some olive oil. I added milk, soy sauce, tomato paste and a splash of lemon juice and seasoned it with Garam Masala, Turmeric and a little Allspice. Finished with about 1 T of brown sugar and S&P. Absolutely wonderful. I put it on some sticky rice with rice vinegar on it. Really wonderful. Outdid myself once again!

 

I got a project done for my store and as a reward got to stream 2 episodes of Food Network Star. Tomorrow I get to work with G all night. I am incredibly excited about this. I’ve never been so looking forward to going to work before. Even if I don’t get to talk to him most of the night, I will be very content just knowing that he is there.

I hope I amaze the men in my life as much as they amaze me.

Living with others and disordered eating

First of all, YAY I finally got to cook myself some foodstuffs and so therefore remembered to take a couple of pictures! Huzzah!! So today I actually have something to show for!

I also wanted to add that I am SO SO glad that I am much better. I cannot IMAGINE living here and still being disordered. It would be the friggin death of me. Even though they are actually really REALLY good with portion sizes and healthy ingredients, I would still die of constant anxiety attacks. “What did he put in this? Is there milk? Butter? How much of it? HOW MANY CALORIES ARE IN THIS?? How much rice did I just take? Does that look like a cup or a cup and a half? I can’t put some BACK, they’d know something was wrong. Oh no, she put cream in my coffee, she knows I USED to take cream in my coffee…I shouldn’t drink this but I don’t want to be a rude houseguest. He made me eggs and toast, what did he fry the egg in? How much of it? Did he put butter on this toast? I’m sure this bread has twice the amount of calories as my ‘diet’ bread…and he gave me 2 SLICES?” And the inner dialogue would go on and on and on and on until my brain would absolutely explode with anxiety. This was why I started cooking. So I could control every single little minute detail of EVERYTHING that went into my food. When I couldn’t do that, I couldn’t eat something without being INCREDIBLY upset and anxious.

That was me a year ago.

This is me now: “Thank you so much for making me dinner! I really appreciate it! This looks amazing! Why yes,  I would love to share a beer with you! That was absolutely delicious! Thanks again!”

And the inner dialogue matches the outer dialogue perfectly.

I love living here.

Breakfast:

Cheesy Mushroom and Egg Casserole

Taken from: http://www.turkishfoodandrecipes.com/2009/01/cheesy-mushroom-egg-casserole-mantar-ve.html

½ lb mushrooms, brushed and sliced
2 tbsp butter/olive oil
1-2 pairs of green onions, chopped (optional)
3 eggs, beaten
1 cup milk
½ tbsp starch
½ cup crumbled feta/ Mexican cheese
½ tsp any kind of seasoning
½ tsp salt to taste

In a skillet, sauté mushrooms with butter over medium heat, till all the water evaporates. Then stir in green onions and sauté over low medium for 1-2 minutes.
Meanwhile dissolve starch in milk and add salt, eggs and seasoning. Mix them all.
Preheat the oven to 350-375F (180-190 C) and place mushrooms in a Pyrex or baking dish and sprinkle feta/Mexican Cheese over them. Finally pour egg-milk mixture and stir gently with a fork to distribute mushrooms and cheese evenly in egg mixture.
Bake for 25-30 minutes, till the surface turns light brown.
Serve Cheesy Mushroom Egg Casserole warm.
ENJOY

*I used goat’s cheese for the crumbled cheese in this, it was SO good! So so good! For the seasoning I used ground thyme, dried rosemary, s&p. I had no idea rosemary and goat’s cheese were lovers. But they are.

Lunch:

Tomato Goat’s Cheese soup with Carrots and Peas

1 cup Chicken Stock
1/2 cup Milk
I dunno….between 1/8 and 1/4 cup Goats Cheese
1/3 cup Peas
1 Carrot, sliced
1/2 Tomato, chopped
1 T Tomato Paste
2 slices Onion, chopped
1 clove Garlic, grated
A little butter and oil
Coriander
Cinnamon
S&P

Melt a small pat of butter along with a little oil in a pot. Cook the onion until translucent. Add garlic. Add peas and carrots. Allow to cook and brown a little. Add chopped tomatoes, cook until most of the liquid is cooked out. Add stock, paste, and spices. Simmer for about 5 minutes. Melt in goat’s cheese and simmer another 5 minutes or until carrots are tender. Serve up! I apparently have a thing for goat’s cheese today. If you don’t like it, I’m sure you can any kind of melty cheese!

Dinner:

We had leftovers of the tofu, carrot and potato curry from yesterday and I STILL forgot to take a picture! COME ON! 😦 I can’t be any more unreliable right now. Sad.

 

It’s so great to be able to enjoy food with people again. I definitely still eat healthy, as does my brother and sister-in-law. So it makes it easy to eat with them. Their portion sizes are always appropriate. When they serve up ice cream, they serve it in ramekins that only hold about a “standard serving”. They stay thin because they eat right and stay active. Not because they count every single calorie. If they can do it, I can too!

Does anyone out there have to eat with people that are hard to eat with? Like…do they chock everything full of butter? And then give you a WHOPPING plate of food enough for an entire family? I can’t imagine having to eat with people like that, I’d like to hear your family/roommate eating experiences.

Exercise: 1/2 hour of yoga, 7 mile or so walk

 

Superfast update

No time for blogging, must work…work all the time. Rest is for the weak and mortal.

The “exclusive rights” flirting in between has been incredibly pleasant though. I am now going to be making a pair of yoga pants that I am to eventually be oogled in, of course whilst doing my yoga.

Breakfast:

Smoked Sausage Omelette with sauteed Mushrooms and Onions and Sharp Cheddar

That was it! I think I also used a little garlic powder and S&P of course, but otherwise these were very simply seasoned. I chopped a little green onion on top. I always cook my fillings separately from the actual omelette and fold them in afterwards. I do usually melt the cheese onto the omelette while its still cooking in the pan. Incredible!

Lunch:



Green, Green Pea Soup with Ginger and Cilantro

Taken from: http://family.go.com/food/recipe-890651-green–green-pea-soup-with-ginger-and-cilantro-t/

Ingredients

2 tablespoons butter
1 smallish yellow onion, chopped
1 teaspoon each finely chopped ginger and garlic
kosher salt
3 large sprigs cilantro (plus more for garnish)
1 fist-sized potato, peeled and diced (I did not use potato)
1 quart chicken broth
1 16-ounce bag of frozen petite peas
1 cup coconut milk, shaken (plus more for drizzling)

Directions

Heat the butter in a soup pot over medium-low heat and sauté the onion, ginger, and garlic until the onion is just getting translucent, around 3 minutes. Add the cilantro, potato, and broth, bring to a boil over high heat, then reduce the heat and simmer, uncovered, until the potato is tender, around 20 minutes.
Add the peas and cook for another 6 or 7 minutes, until the peas are bright green and tender, then stir in the coconut milk (save a few whole peas for garnish, if you like).
Puree the soup with a stick blender or in batches, very carefully, in a blender (for a silky-smooth texture, you can pass it through a food mill). Taste the soup for salt and serve, garnished with the reserved peas, a few cilantro leaves and a drizzle of coconut milk.

*Even though I cut the potato, this was still VERY delicious. You will be tempted to add lemon juice. Don’t do it. I wanted to and was really glad that I did not. It lets the cilantro shine as the “citrus”-y ingredient. I can see how the potato would make it a little “creamier”, but I didn’t mind that it was a thinner soup. I always make everything creamy, I didn’t have to this time.

Dinner:

AGAIN forgot to take a picture. AGAIN! This is terrible and unacceptable. I am very sorry. I will do everything I can to remember tomorrow night! We had grilled brats with sauerkraut and grilled butternut squash with a little butter and brown sugar. Mmmmmm! SUPER yummy! Pretty too, of course no picture…I suck.

 

I finished off my Candy Corn and Cadbury Eggs. So now the only thing I have left is about 3/4 of a bag of Starburst Jelly Beans. After I am done with it I am done with candy for a while.

OH OH this is really cute! Last night “Future Husband #1” was telling me about how he wants to get back into working out and get healthy and all that. We had quite a lengthy conversation about it.  It’s so cute because I know he’s doing it to try and win me over, be more attractive to me, etc…since of course being fit and healthy are very important to me.

And it will work.

Exercise: 1/2 hour of yoga, Short 2 mile walk

Waking up to the TV on sucks…

Luckily the boys weren’t up all night this time…but shithead’s best friend was up early this morning and had the TV on. I didn’t get to do my yoga. And I didn’t get to make anything cool because the boys took up all the counterspace with pizza boxes.  *sigh*…At least he was watching 30 Rock. If I had to wake up to anything, I’m glad it was that.

The one and only reason I am not gone yet is that I was oblivious to the fact that my brother would be out of town this weekend. I’m fairly certain they come home Monday and will be making moving arrangements as soon as they are home. I’ve sent my application to the landlord for the apartment which I’m certain he will approve. I have great credit, have 2 jobs and am in a more desperate position than most people. He seemed really willing to help me out.

Breakfast:

Cereal. Once again…no room to cook. 😦

Lunch:

Tuna and Apple Salad Sandwich

I don’t know that I could tell you how I made this, but it was delicious. I used some chopped apple, celery, raisins, walnuts, half a can of tuna, some light mayo, honey and lemon juice till the consistency looked right. Then I split open some french break and served it up along with the extra apple that wouldn’t fit into the mixture. Great for something quick!

Dinner:

Tuna and Quinoa Casserole

Taken from: http://cohokitchen.blogspot.com/2011/10/salmon-quinoa-casserole.html

You will need:
1 1/4 cup quinoa
3/4 cup sour cream
1 cup plain yogurt
3 Tablespoons Dijon mustard
1 cup shredded cheese (cheddar or similar)
1/2 cup parmesan
2 tablespoons butter
18 ounces (3 cans) canned salmon (or tuna)
2 cups frozen peas
2 cups chopped vegetables* (I used onion, parsnips and something else…I can’t remember)
Salt and pepper, to taste (I also threw in a little garlic powder)

Preheat your oven to 425.

In a medium bowl, mix the sour cream, yogurt, mustard, shredded cheese, and about half of the Parmesan cheese together. Add the drained salmon, and (uncooked!) quinoa and mix well. Finally add the vegetables, and melted butter. Season with salt and pepper to taste.

Pour the mixture into an 8x8x2 or similarly sized baking dish and sprinkle with the remaining Parmesan.

Bake for about 30 minutes.

Devour.

*I’d like to remember what else it was I used as this was ABSOLUTELY scrumptious. I raved about how great it was to my cousin the entire time I was eating it, so damn…I hope I can remember what else was in it…but truthfully, put whatever veggies you want in this! That’s the point, whatever you have on hand will work no matter what it is! Oddly enough this was my first tuna casserole. I will be making them again MUCH more often!

 

Today I leave you with hope and love. I end on sour notes so much these days and its a holiday weekend, so remember to love yourselves girls. The minute you learn to do this, the more your life will improve in so many ways. Love is the gateway to happiness.

Exercise: 1 hour at the gym

Moving

I’m hoping to move into my brother’s within the next week.

The landlord of the apartment had no issues with my self-employment or lack of money at the moment. I explained the situation to him and he’s willing to work with me. I’m going to try and get him a deposit per my dad’s generosity and he’s said he will hold the place for a couple weeks until I’ve got the first month’s rent. All I’d need to do is move my bed, work table and fabric to my brother’s for a little while and work my ass off there until I’ve got the money. The landlord even said he’d prorate the rent for me since I’d only be there for like a week and a half in April. I’m going to do my best to not spend a lot. I will be cutting a lot of costs living over there and I think it will help me a lot.

And of course I need to sell my bike.

That would get rid of 2 of my credit card debts completely. Then I would only have 1.

I’m going to get my bike up on eBay Classifieds as well for a little more exposure. I have to do everything I can to sell this thing.

My husband was up all night with his best friend again last night. I was up from about 3 AM to 4:30AM tossing and turning while all I can hear are drumbeats of music and sporadic loud laughter and singing. I finally got tired of it and went downstairs to look for my earplugs. (My brother gave them to me a while back when I had to share a room with my mom at a hotel…he knows she snores loudly and thought they might be of use to me.) I did find them. Went to the bathroom to wash them off, making it fully clear that I was awake and not happy. Then went back upstairs and was soon dead to the world in a beautiful silence. I let shithead know I was pissed at him the next day and that he was not to speak to me. He says he’s sorry. He’s not sorry. He said he was sorry last time he did this. So if he really was sorry, he wouldn’t keep doing it. He doesn’t give a shit about me.

I’m just overly ready to move on with my life.

Breakfast:

Coconut Oatmeal with Yogurt and Mango

Made half a cup of oatmeal with half coconut milk and half water, plopped on a ton of greek yogurt and diced half a mango and threw it on top. Tossed a little unsweetened coconut on all of that. Perfect little morning pick-me-up that was quick and easy! This way I could get straight to work and not worry about the fact that there are 2 dipshits in the house that I’d rather avoid.

Lunch:

Quinoa and Tuna Salad

Quinoa with tuna, peas, corn, diced red pepper, tomatoes, celery and a little onion with apple cider vinegar, olive oil and splash of lemon juice. S&P to taste and a big dollop of cottage cheese on top. Brilliant! Light, fresh, GREAT for a pre-workout with tons of protein! I couldn’t have been happier!

Dinner:

Mango Chicken

I’ve made this before, though I liked the second version from the weed website more (without the weed), but it required yogurt and I am out now! So I used this one:

http://thaifood.about.com/od/thairecipes/r/mangochicken.htm

Ingredients:

  • (SERVES 4)
  • 2-3 chicken breasts, cut into 2 inch-long pieces (chicken thigh works too)
  • 1 red bell pepper, OR 1 sweet red pepper
  • 1/4 cup oil for pan-frying
  • 1 cup all-purpose flour (or rice flour) mixed with 1/2 tsp. salt
  • 1/4 to 1/2 cup fresh coriander
  • Optional: extra 1/2 to 1 mango, cut into chunks (to finish the dish)
  • Optional: 3-4 Tbsp. coconut milk OR water
  • MANGO SAUCE:
  • 2 fresh ripe mangos, fruit scooped out (or substitute 2 cups frozen or canned mango)
  • 1 red chili, de-seeded and diced, OR 1 tsp. chili sauce OR 1/2 tsp. dried crushed chili
  • 1 Tbsp. rice vinegar (OR white or apple cider)
  • 1+1/2 Tbsp. soy sauce
  • 2 Tbsp. fish sauce
  • juice of 1/2 lime
  • 1 Tbsp. brown sugar
  • 1 thumb-size piece galangal OR ginger, sliced
  • 3 cloves garlic
  • 1/4 tsp. turmeric
  • 2 kaffir lime leaves, snipped into slivers with scissors (discard stem & central vein), OR zest of 1 lime

Preparation:

  1. Place all ‘Mango Sauce’ ingredients in a food processor or blender. Process well, until more or less smooth.
  2. Taste-test the sauce. The goal is to reach a balance of sweet, sour, spicy, and salty. Add more sugar if you find the sauce too sour (this will depend on the sweetness of your mangoes). If not spicy enough, add more chili. If not salty/flavorful enough, add more fish sauce. If too salty or too sweet, add more lime juice. Set aside.
  3. Stir the flour and salt together and place in a mixing-type bowl. Add the chicken pieces and turn or gently stir them to coat.
  4. Heat a wok or frying pan over medium-high heat. Add the oil, then begin frying the chicken pieces. Fry 3-5 minutes per side, or until light golden brown and cooked through. Remove chicken from pan and set on paper towel, or a clean surface.
  5. Wash out the wok/frying pan, or use another (clean) one. Set over medium-high heat and add the mango sauce plus red pepper. Bring to a gentle boil, then reduce to a simmer (medium to low heat). If sauce becomes too thick, add 3-4 Tbsp. water or coconut milk. Simmer 3-4 minutes, or until pepper has softened slightly but still retains some crispness.
  6. Add the fried chicken pieces, gently stirring them in to cover with sauce. If desired, add chunks of mango (fruit of 1/2 to 1 ripe mango) too. Simmer briefly, just until everything is hot.
  7. Do a final taste-test for salt (tasting the sauce together with the chicken). Add a little more fish sauce or chili if desired.
  8. Transfer to a serving dish. Sprinkle with fresh coriander and serve with plenty of Thai jasmine-scented rice. Or, for an extra special treat, with my Easy Coconut Rice.

*I did not fry my chicken in flour. I sliced it up and seared it in oil for a few minutes. Removed it. Then stir fried some onions, red pepper and shiitake mushrooms. I blended all the sauce ingredients in a food processor and dumped them in after the onions were translucent. I cooked this down for a little while. Re-added the chicken and added extra mango cubes. I served this on a little sticky rice. One of my favorites! VERY yum!

 

One of my TV loves, Alton Brown, is on another diet. It’s INCREDIBLY fascinating for me to watch. He Twitters his weight every morning (kind of like I used to do on here) and what he’s eating and whatnot. He says he’s “disgusting” at 175 and wants to lose 10 lbs so he can fit into his tux more comfortably. It’s just absolutely fascinating for me to see someone I admire and look up to, a man nonetheless (proving this is not simply an “unrealistic female-standard” problem) whom I think is gorgeous and totally fuckable as-is, with the same damn body issues as I have. It actually makes me feel better about me, to know that we really are all in this together and that things are going to be fine if we can just gain a little self-confidence. I just have to look at ME the way I look at HIM and say “YES! I too am fuckable as-is!”

TMI?

Somehow, I still feel it works.

Exercise: 1/2 hour of yoga, a little over 1 hour at the gym